Discussion Why are you still here?

[theboy]

I feel obligated to be here, but

what reasons do you have?

 

[zanshu]

Life just keeps happening, I guess. I failed two times before so I'm making sure this time it will absolutely work and I'd have nothing holding me back.
Right now though, I still have friends and family I deeply care about (no more relationship, thankfully), but then again problems keep turning up in my life so I feel like I'm running out of time here.
I've had the 16th Dec 2026 marked as a potential CTB date for two years now so I'm hoping I'll have the guts to fully do it until then.
And if I don't, well, I'll just wait for the next moment.

 

[EmptyBottle]

similar, time just ticks by sometimes... and other times I'm relaxing (or not).

 

[rottenbeing]

Waiting to obtain the ingredients for a reliable method. Takes huge planning and deliberation. Then, I will be happily gone.(Hopefully)

 

[SummerTrip]

Fear and obligation, for such a long time.
Now, being rid of all of it I'm just waiting for a good date and (hopefully) a partner.
Either way, I'm out kinda soon.
Just want to end it when it all started, no matter whether I'm alone or not.

 

[system1234]

Waiting to get my hand on SN or plan a proper plan.

 

[3rdworldsadness]

I don't want to be here...life seems forceful to keep you stay without giving a proper way out..... strange. I'm trying to end it all more that's what I can say.

 

[LostHighway]

Why are you here? It's hard to end a life. I can't find Fentanyl. That is how I want to end things. And there is a treatment that might help me but it most likely won't. It will cost $15,000. Is my life worth that? I'm older. So likely not. And if it doesn't help I will have wasted money that could have gone to rent. I wish I could get my hands on that Fentanyl.

 

[FuneralCry]

Because I exist in this terrible, horrible world where dying peacefully is made illegal by humans who want others to suffer for as long as possible in this existence that I just always saw as a mistake, all I want is the peace of non-existence where this terrible, futile and dreadful existence is all gone and forgotten.

I'll just always see it as an abomination to exist, this existence is a mistake that never should had been imposed that just causes and brings all this cruelty, pain and suffering with no limit as to how much one can be tortured, I always suffer so much from being trapped in this tortuous existence of futile suffering.

 

[Dubito]

No Method.

 

[suncide10]

Because I'm young and I know things might change. It's hard to see it at the moment but there's still small hope and I can't let it go. There's still things I want to experience, and I don't wanna die with regrets.

 

[skyunderthesea]

I'm going to a concert on Saturday, but after that I'm most likely gonna do it, unless I chicken out and go to the hospital

 

[valar_morghulis21]

I feel obligated to be here, but

what reasons do you have?

Suicidal but haven't committed yet. I feel understood in this place. I have no community and friendships in real life so this site is my safe space

 

[NumbForLife]

Fear of death and survival instinct. You know, the shit built into our wiring. My survival instinct is definitely on the very strong side considering everything I've endured in this life. Recently I go back and forth a lot between staying and attempting because I don't see the point of living out a life full of suffering until I die. There's really no optimism in my situation in terms of medical treatment so unless I actually meet someone who wants to date me there's really no point to stay. It's hard to go through with it though.

 

[sick&tired]

My family(the best ever) and fear…if I weren't suffering so much (chronic illness) I'd want to stay. I loved my life so much </3

 

[baeblade]

Can't find a good location. Don't want people seeing my corpse and getting traumatized.

 

[delinquentsandwich]

stuff just keeps happening

my desire to die is all the same but stuff pops up and I'm just like, "fuck it, we ball"

I suppose my answer is that: I'm still having a little bit of fun

 

[(UN)COMMON SENSE]

to prove the h8ters wrong

 

[idontwantthisplease]

My art skills, buldak and beef burger steak

 

[Passenger4224]

My answer to the question is, I don't fucking know

 

[FreakOnALeash]

Some lingering "what if's/what could be's" honestly on potential for certain skills but otherwise not a lot. Especially with my current dire circumstances. I'm in constant mental anguish anyway and extremely lonely while constantly being left behind, bullied, and excluded from anyone I had remotely considered friend/family. I guess I'm just trying to find the right method at this point and set a date.

 

[Green Destiny]

Been the case for a long time but I just can't get the means to take my own life since I don't live alone and trying to get things like SN would attract attention.

 

[Penelope12]

I'm afraid of being discovered

 

[LigottiIsRight]

Because I'm stupid enough to procrastinate my suicide. The fact that I'm still capable of finding some things pleasurable (or at least entertaining) probably plays a role on it.

 

[Dawnfang]

Just waiting for something to push me past SI

 

[porcelain.ribbon]

i know that I'll ruin my girlfriends life if i leave her and i just cannot to do that to her

 

[chocolocothechocobo]

still deciding on whether to try the legal route (MAiD) first or not. doubt that they would accept me as a mental health patient (despite multiple severe chronic illnesses that leave me bedbound) though. I also know my SI is strong and I dont want a violent method that traumatizes whoever finds me even more so I'm rather low on viable options.