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Apricity

Apricity

Wizard
Jul 27, 2021
642
I want to ctb tonight so bad, but I keep thinking about tomorrow. My SI I guess. I still have my rope, but I can't get over the gagging and choking feeling. I have Nitrogen ordered, but they're taking their sweet time and I'm getting pissed and impatient. I just want it all to stop.
 
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Reactions: patheticpartner
RevolutionaryRed

RevolutionaryRed

Member
Apr 8, 2018
60
Relax. I felt what you feel right now. Suicide shouldn't be impulsive. That's how you'll just end up injured and not dead . Your anxieties are valid but there must be a better way to cope until you have an exit plan. Tried going for a walk ? Lol
 
BeansOfRequirement

BeansOfRequirement

Man-child, loser, autistic, etc.
Jan 26, 2021
5,845
Why the rush? Physical pain? If it's only mental/emotional there are actually ways to reduce the suffering.
 
Apricity

Apricity

Wizard
Jul 27, 2021
642
Why the rush? Physical pain? If it's only mental/emotional there are actually ways to reduce the suffering.
I have both. My evil bitch ex boss pushed me to the point of severely injuring my back. My discs are done. I've had several procedures done and nothing helps the pain. Additionally, I'm dealing with the end of my marriage to the love of my life.
 
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  • Love
Reactions: LittleJem, NasiGoreng, A_miStake_of_NATURE and 1 other person
BeansOfRequirement

BeansOfRequirement

Man-child, loser, autistic, etc.
Jan 26, 2021
5,845
I have both. My evil bitch ex boss pushed me to the point of severely injuring my back. My discs are done. Additionally, I'm dealing with the end of my marriage to the love of my life.
Holy shit, that's horrible.
 
  • Like
Reactions: down for the count
Apricity

Apricity

Wizard
Jul 27, 2021
642
20210824 000417 I'm pretty sure this will hold. I just want to get over the choking feeling and the gagging. I'm tired of being tired.
 
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  • Aww..
Reactions: A_miStake_of_NATURE and BeansOfRequirement
Apricity

Apricity

Wizard
Jul 27, 2021
642
I passed out before i could even try. Luckily i woke up before anyone else and took it down so i didn't get caught.
 
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Reactions: ClownMe
ClownMe

ClownMe

Don't Cry for Me, I'm Already Dead
Apr 7, 2021
20,560
I passed out before i could even try. Luckily i woke up before anyone else and took it down so i didn't get caught.
Hey! I'm glad you didn't go yet, I know as well as anyone how it feels to want to leave immediately, ive gotta wait until my dog passes away to attempt suicide unfortunately. You say you've got nitrogen coming soon? I'm assuming you're gonna do the exit bag method? That'd be less painful than hanging. Just try and hang in there a bit longer, it sucks but hopefully it'll all be worth it in the end.
 
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Reactions: Apricity
FuneralCry

FuneralCry

Just wanting some peace
Sep 24, 2020
48,644
I'm sorry you are suffering so much, living is painful and I understand that it is hard to carry on when you are feeling hopeless. I wish you well.
 
Apricity

Apricity

Wizard
Jul 27, 2021
642
My Nitrogen order has been delayed again. New estimated ship date is 9/9. I don't want to wait that long. I'm getting angry and anxious. I tried a large Nationwide supplier but they want me to fill out some paperwork to even be able to buy from them.
 

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