Venting why am i such a fuck up

[sickgirlzis]

I feel like ever since I was a kid ive just been unfairly blamed for minor mistakes. I've literally been parentified and taking care of someone else ever since I was 10, on top of that I had to suffer sexual abuse for years, and im convinced I may have autism and adhd which effects how I go about things and process information in tandem with all these things.

Its ridiculous how im expected to do everything correctly the first time with no mistakes. im literally not even able to think. ive had to handle so much mental weight from a young age that I just feel completely shut off. I wish people would have more grace for everyone, we can't be perfect 24/7 :/

 

[_Maya]

I feel like ever since I was a kid ive just been unfairly blamed for minor mistakes. I've literally been parentified and taking care of someone else ever since I was 10, on top of that I had to suffer sexual abuse for years, and im convinced I may have autism and adhd which effects how I go about things and process information in tandem with all these things.

Its ridiculous how im expected to do everything correctly the first time with no mistakes. im literally not even able to think. ive had to handle so much mental weight from a young age that I just feel completely shut off. I wish people would have more grace for everyone, we can't be perfect 24/7 :/

It's frustrating how much common double standards are in society.
It's "mental health matters" until you're too depressed to do the most basic tasks, It's "be yourself" until being yourself is too "cringe," or "annoying."
It's like that one black mirror episode, "nose dive" where everyone is constantly on edge, the conversations feel forced and you can tell there's no true emotion or meaning behind what anyone says. Because you have to constantly keep up this facade of being the most perfect person, and if you mess up even once people will ridicule you.