Discussion What keeps you here? What helps you keep going?

[Natanael]

It would really help me, and I'd like to know what keeps you going and what specific strategies you use when you're at your lowest point—or what helps you get through those tough times

 

[Maki9]

Probably the people I love

Wbu?

 

[Natanael]

Probably the people I love

Wbu?

I think it's a combination of many things

But part of it is my family, and part of it is that I'm really mad at life, which is why I try to fight

Also, my previous attempt at CTB was a bit traumatic

 

[SoLowHollow48]

I think it's a combination of many things

But part of it is my family, and part of it is that I'm really mad at life, which is why I try to fight

Also, my previous attempt at CTB was a bit traumatic

I came across people here who dislike the idea of continuing life out of spite. Yours is definitely a refreshing take.

I'm sorry that you gotta go through what you went through there to the point that you attempted. Whatever it was, it couldn't be easy. I'm kinda glad that you're still here today. This means that I'm not entirely alone in wanting to stay. It's a comforting thought.

Well, I have the same reason as you. My family. I also want to throw a big funeral party. I can't do that without any money right now

 

[Mio_Kamimachi]

music! i can not imagine a life in which i don't constantly listen to music. music drowns the world out and calms me. music can speak my emotions when i can't and make me feel comforted. music can give me energy, happiness and make me secretly dance like an idiot in public. there are many small things in my life that help keep me going but music is the only big thing that helps me keep going. can't listen to music and any new songs of my favorite artists if i am dead. i assume i wouldn't care about this when dead but i am not dead, i think, so i still care.

i also agree with living because of spite!

 

[kiwimochii]

The people around me honestly. Even thought I've tried to convince myself that no one would care i also can't imagine a world where they wouldn't be devastated by my death. Makes me wish I never made any lasting friendships/relationships because leaving just got a whole lot harder lol.

 

[Natanael]

music! i can not imagine a life in which i don't constantly listen to music. music drowns the world out and calms me. music can speak my emotions when i can't and make me feel comforted. music can give me energy, happiness and make me secretly dance like an idiot in public. there are many small things in my life that help keep me going but music is the only big thing that helps me keep going. can't listen to music and any new songs of my favorite artists if i am dead. i assume i wouldn't care about this when dead but i am not dead, i think, so i still care.

i also agree with living because of spite!

OHHH! Yesssssssssssss

I feel the same way—music really helps a lot. I spend a lot of time listening to music too, especially to try to motivate myself, and it usually works well, especially epic music

And I like '80s and '90s pop for when I want to chill out

That said, even though I like sad music, if I listen to too much of it, it has the opposite effect—it really gets me down

The people around me honestly. Even thought I've tried to convince myself that no one would care i also can't imagine a world where they wouldn't be devastated by my death. Makes me wish I never made any lasting friendships/relationships because leaving just got a whole lot harder lol.

Yeah, I get that pretty well. When I first tried it, I thought to myself, "I regret having friends," and more than dying, I just wanted to vanish as if I'd never existed

Plus, it's really hard for people to let you go, but I guess that's a good thing in a way

I came across people here who dislike the idea of continuing life out of spite. Yours is definitely a refreshing take.

I'm sorry that you gotta go through what you went through there to the point that you attempted. Whatever it was, it couldn't be easy. I'm kinda glad that you're still here today. This means that I'm not entirely alone in wanting to stay. It's a comforting thought.

Well, I have the same reason as you. My family. I also want to throw a big funeral party. I can't do that without any money right now

It's true, my life has been a series of strokes of bad luck and problems that are kind of tragic, but when they all pile up, it feels so over the top—to the point where it's almost funny. So it makes me angry that life is so unfair and ridiculous to me (or at least that's how I feel)

I don't know if I'll ever win, honestly, but at the very, very least, I want to have something where life hasn't dragged me through the mud and be able to say that at least in one thing, I did manage to win once

Then, whatever happens next i will accept it. If things get better, great; if not, well, okay—I'm tired.

And I think the idea of a big funeral is awesome, hahaha

 

[Dinnerwith6]

music! i can not imagine a life in which i don't constantly listen to music. music drowns the world out and calms me. music can speak my emotions when i can't and make me feel comforted. music can give me energy, happiness and make me secretly dance like an idiot in public. there are many small things in my life that help keep me going but music is the only big thing that helps me keep going. can't listen to music and any new songs of my favorite artists if i am dead. i assume i wouldn't care about this when dead but i am not dead, i think, so i still care.

i also agree with living because of spite!

I love music so much. Definitely one of the best things to come out of mankind. I listen to music all the time, and when I don't have my device on me my brain imagines playlists of songs and I just go through that. XD

It would really help me, and I'd like to know what keeps you going and what specific strategies you use when you're at your lowest point—or what helps you get through those tough times

As for the strategies I use to get through difficult times it would probably be journaling. It doesn't have to be long or coherent, just a way to write any thoughts down. It's been very helpful for me, lots of thoughts I didn't know I had until I grabbed a pen. But you can use your device as well if you're scared someone'll discover what you've written down (^U^)

 

[supplementalo²sucks]

My cat. I feel like once she goes, i will too. It's so annoying though my younger brother has been calling me retard and that im a leech basically forever.
Dad's all "sibling rivalry" about it. When i say i want to be homeless, he says if you really want to, then go be homeless. "You're your own person."
Socially it's fucking ass too because i didn't say my first words until 4, I'm in some stupid job shadow thing which will be over in a few weeks, the people there feel so insulting because i am able to "function." So they're like get over it everybody is different. I hate. 1 time i had a big tonic clonic at his house downstairs by the wash/dryer and was on my side. Wish aspiration pneumonia got me and he found me like that.

 

[Natanael]

My cat. I feel like once she goes, i will too. It's so annoying though my younger brother has been calling me retard and that im a leech basically forever.
Dad's all "sibling rivalry" about it. When i say i want to be homeless, he says if you really want to, then go be homeless. "You're your own person."
Socially it's fucking ass too because i didn't say my first words until 4, I'm in some stupid job shadow thing which will be over in a few weeks, the people there feel so insulting because i am able to "function." So they're like get over it everybody is different. I hate. 1 time i had a big tonic clonic at his house downstairs by the wash/dryer and was on my side. Wish aspiration pneumonia got me and he found me like that.

I love cats, and dogs too, but in my purely personal opinion, it's true that I like cats more than dogs; the fact that they're independent to a certain extent makes them feel more like a companion than a pet

As for the other thing, the truth is that it's hard for other people to understand how you feel and how things affect you; at the time, I also received some pretty hurtful comments about similar things.

I think it's a combination of a general lack of empathy and extremely complex and delicated issues; I wish there were a way to let the other person experience my feelings for just a minute

 

[gonnaAbstract]

music! i can not imagine a life in which i don't constantly listen to music. music drowns the world out and calms me. music can speak my emotions when i can't and make me feel comforted. music can give me energy, happiness and make me secretly dance like an idiot in public. there are many small things in my life that help keep me going but music is the only big thing that helps me keep going. can't listen to music and any new songs of my favorite artists if i am dead. i assume i wouldn't care about this when dead but i am not dead, i think, so i still care.

i also agree with living because of spite!

I'm similar. I stick around mainly for media that I enjoy. There is so much beautiful art in the world that I don't want to miss out on.

 

[Natanael]

As for the strategies I use to get through difficult times it would probably be journaling. It doesn't have to be long or coherent, just a way to write any thoughts down. It's been very helpful for me, lots of thoughts I didn't know I had until I grabbed a pen. But you can use your device as well if you're scared someone'll discover what you've written down (^U^)

That sounds interesting, although I find it hard to express myself that way when there's no one else around, but it's true that putting it into words somehow does help

 

[[redacted]]

I keep going back and forth between feeling ok and wanting to ctb :/

 

[byec560]

Death scary. Simple as.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Distraction and nostalgia. I put on music/ films/ series that I find comforting. Sometimes, there are moments of relief when my brain is occupied by my work and, what's on in the background. I love getting lost in video games too.

 

[Breadkey]

It would really help me, and I'd like to know what keeps you going and what specific strategies you use when you're at your lowest point—or what helps you get through those tough times

I don't know i think the fear of death is the only thing that keeps me alive. And maybe FOMO which is ironic because i missed out on everything in my life

 

[Anthonydaum]

My friends and family. I am very lucky and blessed to have a good foundation for my life, and a good job, but I am struggling with a physical condition that has ruined something that I enjoy most about my life (music and game sounds) and life feels like a cruel joke. The only thing stopping me from CTB is how much it would impact my mom and some of my friends. My mom is sensitive and always has worried about me. It would probably ruin her life, even more than I have ruined mine. I've read stories about what the experience of losing a child to suicide is like and it breaks my heart. The pain propagating from my death is probably many times worse than the pain I experience right now. Which is the cruel thing about life, the depths of suffering are so deep yet ending that suffering just multiplies it

 

[MapleS]

5 months

 

[Bishop]

Survival instinct