What keeps you from ending it?

[throwaway123]

.....

 

[stellabelle]

Technically nothing really. Just not impulsive enough to end things. Might buy sn soon to have on hand

 

[throwaway123]

Technically nothing really. Just not impulsive enough to end things. Might buy sn soon to have on hand

Same but I'm scared of SN because there a mixed opinions.

 

[stellabelle]

Same but I'm scared of SN because there a mixed opinions.

Same. I flip flop between sn, hanging, jumping in front of a train, freezing to death, h or f, and expiring naturally.

 

[Circles]

The pain and the ruminating thoughts of how overwhelming it all is. We're giving up the only thing we'll probably ever have as sentient beings. For as much as I despise consciousness I am still petrified of not knowing what comes next and thinking that this is really it. This shitty life was the only chance we'll ever have to being alive and it fucking sucks. I feel trapped, wronged and corrupted by this unforgiving universe. It just feels like we're only here to be slaughtered and forgotten like a horrible crime being swept away like we were nothing. Our pain means nothing and it's fucking sickening. Nothing feels worth staying and yet it's such a conundrum that I don't know how to feel about it.

 

[Swara N]

next album and concert of my fav mucian

 

[21Neberg]

Short term - I'm going to eat a pizza lol

For real though, I just haven't had the time yet - long enough alone to hang myself. My worst fear is to be 'caught', so I don't like to take risks. I'm sticking to self harm until I have the time.

 

[Macc Lad]

My Daughter

 

[Wednesdays&Cyanide]

Feeling absolutely selfish about hurting the few people who have been doing their utmost to help and support me. Is it sad that the primary person who is keeping me from acting on an attempt is my university professor?

 

[LastDay]

Haven't been able to obtain a method I'm comfortable with. I don't have money or a vehicle so it limits me. Ideally, I would want to do it with a firearm or to CO with someone.

 

[TheRiverStyz]

I'm too fucking considerate is what's stopping me. I don't want to disrupt traffic, don't want to traumatize some poor truck driver/train machinist, don't want my boyfriend finding me covered in blood/blue in the face, don't want to expose other people to dangerous chemicals.

 

[Sanguinius]

That I love life and hope there's another way for me..

 

[crova]

Short term - I'm going to eat a pizza lol

For real though, I just haven't had the time yet - long enough alone to hang myself. My worst fear is to be 'caught', so I don't like to take risks. I'm sticking to self harm until I have the time.

Short term - I'm going to eat a pizza lol

For real though, I just haven't had the time yet - long enough alone to hang myself. My worst fear is to be 'caught', so I don't like to take risks. I'm sticking to self harm until I have the time.

I would die for patat met mayo in the afterlife...

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Fear.

Fear of the pain and trauma. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of the consequences. Fear of oblivion. Fear of ruining the lives of my family.

 

[lost.ghost]

Can't get past my survival instincts

 

[crova]

.....

fear of unknown and then being trapped in a void for eternity.

Fear.

Fear of the pain and trauma. Fear of failure. Fear of success. Fear of the consequences. Fear of oblivion. Fear of ruining the lives of my family.

My method is nitrogen, so pain is not expected.
My greatest fear then is failure. The price to pay is brain damage.

 

[Didymus]

Fear of pain and failure.

 

[21Neberg]

I would die for patat met mayo in the afterlife...

it certainly is a godsent... but can't you eat it in your country too??

 

[crova]

it certainly is a godsent... but can't you eat it in your country too??

Not for me! The best patat only in Amsterdam, mate! :] and this XL cone.
I will never forget the texture and how the combine with mayonese.
I wonder if this place is still in business. It was near Rembrandtplein [I tried google streets but I can be sure after, well 18 years]

 

[21Neberg]

Not for me! The best patat only in Amsterdam, mate! :] and this XL cone.
I will never forget the texture and how the combine with mayonese.
I wonder if this place is still in business. It was near Rembrandtplein [I tried google streets but I can be sure after, well 18 years]

Even if the place isn't in business anymore, there's thousands of places across the country where you can eat patat. I hope you get to eat it sometime soon!

 

[Lifeisatrap]

Fear of failure, I'm the type of person who needs their hand held for everything since I seem to have a knack for screwing things up when I'm doing it on my own especially suicide. I also have an irrational fear of death not being the end of it but mostly fear of failure. In addition to waiting till the coast is clear so I can finally do it without any interferance.

 

[ReadyasEver]

Wrapping up loose ends and I'm still feeling OK physically, but that's not going to last forever.

 

[lookin4areason]

fear of failure because i'm not sure on the HOW. i have ideas but no way to know if it would work. i would not want it to fail and be discovered and have everything come out that I've kept to myself for soooo many years. or fail and be a vegetable or something. it needs to be done right and i don't have that kind of confidence in myself. but i know the time is coming that i NEED to get this done, somehow. i don't want to be here

 

[JJ-NOHOPE]

Apparently I don't really understand the difference between wishes, desire and hope.

I wish I could have a happy, love filled life.
I desire love.
I do not have hope for these things. I know that I am far too damaged and worthless to have these things.

But I am too weak I guess to just end my suffering.

 

[mattwitt]

Right this second it's my niece and her 3 kids living in the same house I'm stuck living in. Also some unfinished business which could easily stay unfinished if I'm in the right mood for ctb

 

[Kyrok]

1. I don't want to hurt my parents
2. I don't want my dog to feel abandoned by me.
3. I don't want to shoulder my wife with all the work of selling the house, etc.
4. If I can just hold out for four or five more years, I can retire and have hope my life then won't suck.

 

[mattwitt]

1. I don't want to hurt my parents
2. I don't want my dog to feel abandoned by me.
3. I don't want to shoulder my wife with all the work of selling the house, etc.
4. If I can just hold out for four or five more years, I can retire and have hope my life then won't suck.

I'd have to hold out for 30 more years to retire lol Ain't no way !!! lol

 

[Tomey]

Getting N

 

[crova]

Apparently I don't really understand the difference between wishes, desire and hope.

I wish I could have a happy, love filled life.
I desire love.
I do not have hope for these things. I know that I am far too damaged and worthless to have these things.

But I am too weak I guess to just end my suffering.

I think you understand it pretty well. You are just to harsh on yourself.
But then its all us here who are.

 

[Dark Soul]

@JJ-NOHOPE, why you think you are worthless and you find never a wonderfull love? I understand your fear, but i hope you find this! Love is the only matters of life!
I hope you understand my bad english?