Discussion What is the worst thing you've ever done?

[ZardozOmega]

I've done a bunch of really horrible stuff, and they constantly come back to haunt me.

 

[Good4Nothing]

Cared about a girl, apparently.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

Decided to not go overseas. All of the time, effort, and money that people invested in me went to waste. I regret it so much.

 

[Valon]

Being born.

 

[Dreamless Sleep]

*deleted*

It worked for Ryan Gosling! lol

 

[ZardozOmega]

I meant something evil

 

[BitterlyAlive]

I meant something evil

I mean, it's what I consider the worst thing I've ever done. I deceived people for years.

 

[checkouttime]

I wouldn't even know where to start, it would be hard to pick just one thing!

 

[kevin1192]

Abandoned my family

 

[GlowingCactus]

For years, I let someone else do all the work that was supposed to be for 2 people.
At the time I had paralyzing anxiety, I couldn't do anything, I couldn't even speak.
I guess it wasn't really my fault but nonetheless I felt really bad about it and it made me hate myself even more.
I still feel bad when I think about it.

 

[tsuina]

depends- intentionally horrible, or unintentionally horrible?
i was a pretty mean kid on the internet, but when i got to my teens it got especially bad. doxxing people online who didn't know better. trapping people in shitty situations just to fuck them over. taking people's money and running like the wind.
probably the worst thing i did.. a druggie guy i knew was aware of a man who had sent me around 200 dollars in total when i was about 14. he told me he was going to threaten him with legal action for child pornography and force said man to send him hundreds of dollars in BTC or else he'd report him to the authorities. i went along with it, happily. i still feel guilty.
and as of the present day, saying bad things to my partner in moments of rage, even though they've said even worse to me.. all of it is my fault for retaliating, and i don't dare speak on the cruel things they say to me too.. so i guess me saying bad things back is horrible of me

 

[VIBRITANNIA]

exist. stereotypical answer, i know, but the list is too long.

 

[Smellanie]

When I was growing up I was extremely angry/depressed for various reasons. I got very violent and took it out on others. I've gotten alot better but still not perfect. I regret it all the time.

 

[BitterlyAlive]

When I was growing up I was extremely angry/depressed for various reason. I got very violent and took it out on others. I've gotten alot better but still not perfect. I regret it all the time.

Me too. I was and am still a bitch to my parents. Oftentimes it started fights between them when I was a kid, which would escalate into actual abuse.

 

[inflammed123]

I've done a bunch of really horrible stuff, and they constantly come back to haunt me.

you ask other people to share, what exactly have you done that's so bad?

 

[esse_est_percipi]

I don't know. Probably repressed it.

But I have said some quite nasty things in the past, specifically to opponents who beat me in online chess.
Which is why I pretty much stopped playing, never knew I had that kind of nastiness in me, and it depressed me

 

[eternalappraiser]

I don't know that I've ever done anything that bad? And I think what's depressing is that no one else on this website has either, but we still all want to die, but if you look out into the world all of the actual fucking evil people are as happy as can be. It's a cruel joke from the universe.

 

[Xocoyotziin]

Trash talked my ex while we were dating to my friends because they didn't like him and I wanted to win them back. Then I cut them off because he didn't like them, like wtf was I even thinking. I was a vicious little bitch, it's absolutely unbelievable. Granted, he did some very similar stuff to me. We were kind of birds of a feather that way but I was much more blatant.

I did other crazy stereotypical BPD stuff too, like accusing him of cheating, going through his phone and email, sending him WALLS of text about how angry I was about something or other while he was at fucking work. I mean, he was cheating on me, but I don't know if that was before or after I went batshit on him. If after it's more than understandable. So I'm left with some unanswered questions as to what was really going on. Either way I could have done things a lot differently and my life pre 20s was littered with bs like this. Still have problems but they're more confined.

 

[muffin222]

I can't post about it on here because it's too painful and shameful for me to recollect, and I don't want my experience on the forum to be tainted by it. Obviously it wasn't murder or theft or anything like that, but it was a terrible, impulsive act I committed many years ago against someone I loved.

It occurred at a time when I wasn't nearly as self-aware or reflective as I am now. I'm still haunted by it, but I try to forgive myself because it happened so long ago, and I'm a radically different person now

 

[Isadeth]

Putting my own goals and ambitions on hold for others. Now feeling too old to take the next step in life.

 

[Blank Dreamer]

I dunno, being the child of a coward father who abandoned his own family for some other woman? More than once?
Or being the reason that caused my father to do so?

Not being able to confess to a childhood sweetheart a long time ago. Or meeting them in the first place.

 

[Stick]

I was like 10 I think, and I'm pretty sure I might have left someone to die. I was in the car with my Mom and sister at a stop-sign. Just as we were driving off, a motorcyclist didn't slow down and crashed full speed into a parked car next to us, and he flew over the car. My Mom likes her music pretty loud, so none of us heard the crash, and I was the only one on that side of the car so I was the only one who saw it. I was too scared to tell them about it, I'm not sure why. Honestly I think I just didn't want to be late to school, and I didn't really process what happened. I think I kind of just hoped it didn't actually happen. He was still in the air when we drove away.
I'd like to think someone nearby heard the crash and called 911 for him, but I'll never know.

 

[Ghost2211]

I'm sure this won't go well socially for me, but perhaps I should just say it....

When I was 6 I killed a small animal intentionally. I was neglected, physically and emotionally abused. I didn't know how to handle my sadness, anger, and fixation with death. I lied about how it died and nobody knew. I was afraid of how little I cared until it sunk in, and then hated myself for it for years. I never hurt or killed anything since.

 

[death137]

Not receiving my dying father at the airport and not visiting him at the hospital as much as I should because of social anxiety (I was holding his hand when he died at home though).

Deceiving my family that I was going to university class and taking tests/final exam multiple times and for so long.

 

[mahakaliSS_MahaDurga]

Not visiting my dying grandmother at the hospital. I felt guilty about this for years.

 

[GoneGoneGone]

Hmmmm, but should it be subjectively in the eyes of the person affected? I could have shattered some girl's confidence in high school by being a mean girl, but I'll never know.
Or subjectively in our opinion?

 

[VSAA]

Having my first joint, that led to way many more and other stuff.

 

[HappyMstake]

Getting with my ex. He really fucked me up, mentally.

 

[Brianiskillingme]

Took 200 dollars from a friend, then blamed it on another girl. Terrible.

 

[September5th]

Not being the best I could right away to the person that loved me the most.