Truth or good feelings?

[GoodPersonEffed]

Do you prefer the truth in spite of how it feels or is presented? Or do you prefer for someone to try to make you feel good and/or validate your preferences or beliefs, even though they're being untruthful?

These are the only options for this thread!

Feel free to comment about why one or the other is your preference of the two.

 

[avoid_slow_death]

Even if it pisses me off or hurts me, I would rather people be honest. I either will get over it or take it into account or simply ignore the source. I detest dishonesty and platitudes not only because it is fake, but because the truth will come out sooner or later and it will hurt so much more.

 

[Mr2005]

After giving out plenty of the latter I can safely say people are more comfortable with the former and who can blame them?

 

[Myforevercharlie]

Truth please, lies or downsizing something only hurt more in the end.

 

[Yomyom]

What's the truth going to help me exactly?, I prefer to live in a lie but to be happy

 

[Sensei]

What's the truth going to help me exactly?, I prefer to live in a lie but to be happy

This. I've had enough of painful truths in this cruel and unforgiving world.

 

[Epsilon0]

I voted for the second option.

(I know the aim of this thread is to know which of the two options people prefer, and not start a debate, but I can't help myself: Truth is tricky business, because your truth might not be my truth.

Your truth might be that suiciders burn in hell. My truth is that suiciders live happily ever after in the land of unicorns and rainbows. Now if you tell me I will rot in hell, you are just nasty and unpleasant, although according to you, you give me the raw truth.

Furthermore - and this is quite common - what you perceive as truth might simply be a half-truth because you either missunderstand something, or you lack all the pieces of information needed to form an accurate opinion that correctly describes the events you are referring to. In this case, when you speak your truth you just say something half-truthful, and there's a risk it might even be half-stupid.)

 

[Soul]

Truth/honesty are highly overrated and can be extremely destructive in many situations. Many people who say they prefer honesty have no idea what they're talking about.

 

[Una]

I voted for the truth ... but several months ago I would not. I have since learned that nothing is more dangerous than self-soothing illusions.

Having said that, I respect the views of @Soul , @Epsilon0 , @Sensei and @Yomyom ... for they have all said the truth! And said it well.

It is of course all highly subjective, culture and context based.

 

[GoodPersonEffed]

I would rather someone be honest or show me the truth.

This is the motto I live by:

"If any person is able to convince me and show me that I do not think or act rightly, I will gladly change; for I seek the truth, by which no person was ever injured. But they are injured who abide in their error and ignorance." - Marcus Aurelius

I don't like abiding in error and ignorance, it just compounds things and causes harm. In my way of thinking, the truth may hurt, but it never harms.

As far as how the truth is presented...I was reading a self-defense book for using firearms by someone who seems rather abusive, especially toward young women. He made a pretty mean comment about how if someone is wallowing in and whining about PTSD, then the method is not for them. At first I was really offended about how his comment was re-victimizing and dismissive, but I was surprised that it uncovered hidden strength in me, and I in fact became less of a victim. So while I don't value how he said it, and I still don't like or respect him, I found value in his words, and I found a truth that served me. I was made stronger by what was revealed, not by the abusiveness with which it was presented. I didn't throw out the baby with the dirty bathwater.

 

[Brick In The Wall]

The truth is basically hate speech nowadays. People prefer the comfortable self delusions they've created.

Personally I'd prefer the truth. But there's so much disinfo and lies out there that I don't even know what the truth looks like anymore.

 

[Soul]

Who's got The Truth, to be able to convey it to us? If we just mean "an individual's true take on things", it might be interesting in some cases, but (a) how would I get a full view of it? and (b) even if I could, it's not worth any more than my own individual take on things. So what's so special about it?

If we mean some metaphysical absolute: Sure, I would be interested in that, if there were a way it could be conveyed to me.

 

[Epsilon0]

Who's got The Truth, to be able to convey it to us? If we just mean "an individual's true take on things", it might be interesting in some cases, but (a) how would I get a full view of it? and (b) even if I could, it's not worth any more than my own individual take on things. So what's so special about it?

If we mean some metaphysical absolute: Sure, I would be interested in that, if there were a way it could be conveyed to me.

Sign me up for a shot of absolute truth! I would love nothing better.

 

[FusRohDracarys]

Being validated is very important to me. When I feel invalidated, my suicidal urges peak. But at the root of it all, I want to be right and I want people to know it and understand why... so I'd rather be invalidated by the truth than patronized by sugared words.

 

[Life sucks]

I chose the second option and its not only an unpleasant experience but a situation that fucks the person and many can't handle it. I reached the truth behind the truth and how life is inherently shitty, a dark place that most humans are unaware about but its straightforward in front of them. Life is a mistake, I'd rather learn the painful truth and I endured everything in my whole life so I would never reproduce anyone in this shitty world. Life sucks

 

[mesohappy]

I want and need them both,didnt vote.I need you to tell me the truth sometimes..I need you to lie to me sometimes too.

Sometimes the truth conquers lies surrounding you, smacks you into reality.Sometimes a sweet lie can overpower the shocking truth in your mind.You believe it and keep trucking.

Sometimes my truth isnt the same as your truth.

Sometimes one or the other is all that you need to see another day.Do I want the responsibility to administer either one??? Hellll nah.

Sometimes I should shut the fuck up..But I cant,cause im still alive.

I feel like Pilate when he asked Jesus "what is truth"? Then washed his hands in symbolism and let him be crucified.

What the fuck is any of this?

 

[Fragile]

to be honest i want the truth more than anything and finding out exactly what's wrong with me is probably one of the main reasons why i haven't Ctb yet.

i've lived a life of being lied to even with petty stuff, always in the dark about my own life and only hearing the truth being my back. even if they had the best intentions in mind, living like that made me develop a bad case of body dysmorphia and aggravated many other issues, i don't know what my face actually looks like!

it took me years to realize that in reality, most people are healthy and live relatively normal lives. being middle class at that time was weird, the vast majority of families don't have to deal with tragedies left and right, and their kids don't need to be lied to in order to hide their awful reality.

oh, and did you know that doctors, psychologist and even specialists can withhold a clinical diagnosis from you? scary stuff.

 

[Deleted member 1465]

Truth.
But.
The truth of life is that we all head inexorably to the grave and most of us will suffer along the way. Life is to a certain extent about fostering innocence and a wilful delusion in order to put one foot in front of the other. That doesn't mean turning from the truth; it just means compartmentalising it in order to survive.
So I value a certain amount of wilful ignorance, as strange as that sounds, because I recognise that I am mortal and flawed and do not have the mental or emotional capacity to handle the entirety of the truth in one go.

 

[Remember to forget]

I voted truth but I'm not voting for those that think they are doing you a favour by being open but in truth they are just horrible vindictive people. I voted yes to the truth, the truth that prevents you from wasting years with someone you should have left long ago, the friend who asks for you opinion, the one where you say if someone hurt your feelings or that dickhead work colleague who tries to show you up until you tell them just what you think of them. keep on the good side of that fine line between truth and just being a total knob.

 

[262653]

I don't know what do people mean by truth, but to describe it, truth allows to get an accurate of objective reality, and, with proper application of logic/reasoning, allows to predict future events, which in turn allows to chose the most favorable option. My most favorable option is to be in the best possible condition, and the only criterion I have for that is how do I feel. To shorten up, the only benefit I see in truth is to feel good and not feel bad. Practical applications aside, the choice I see is between feeling good and... stochastic opportunity to feel good, so my vote goes straight to the good feelings.

As for practice, @Underscore has already described what I would like to say. A certain combination of both should do the trick, but if we have to think in absolutes, I prefer people being truthful to me.

 

[Brackenshire]

Truth