Triggered

[Roseate]

I was at work and this customer purchased this knife, the one they use to open packages and shit. And now my arms are itching. I don't have an addiction with self harm but I really want to right now. I really want to (sorry don't read this if you trigger easy) grab a knife and just drag it across my skin so fucking deep. I don't wanna talk to my therapist about this cuz then I'll have to acknowledge why I cut and maybe I'm just not ready for that. I just want to bleed. To breathe. To not feel like a fucking abnormal person. Like I just feel like I'm faking it and everyone can see through my act, can see that I don't belong here and I want to not feel like a complete fucking loser.

 

[puppet_nihilist]

I relate to this on some level. I don't take myself seriously because I don't cut, it's like my suicidality is just an act or a twisted fantasy or a show, although I wish I were having some fun at least, instead it interferes with life and causes me to be dysfunctional. I feel you, I hope you can find some consolation somehow.

 

[WornOutLife]

I can relate.
Depression and desperation can make us do whatever.
However, take into account that that's not a good idea at all and you'll just suffer and end up worse than your current situation.

Hope you can feel better soon!

Hugs and love,

Matt