MephistoJustBeneath
Member
- May 21, 2020
- 24
Hello, everyone. I've been lurking around this forum for a while and finally decided to make an account because the community here seems to be the only people I can feel safe talking about this stuff with.
I am a 22-year-old (23 in June) autistic pansexual enby who is tired of living in a broken world that would prefer to see me dead anyway. My college education was a complete waste of time, and I have no career prospects whatsoever. Everything is going to get so much worse after this pandemic is over and I don't want to be around to see it. However, I am not in a position where CTB is viable since I live with my parents and I'm too scared to drive anywhere. I've even picked out a beautiful spot in nature near my home where I would like to die, but I have no way of getting there without arousing suspicion. Essentially, my circumstances have are forcing me to stay on this shithole planet until the bitter end, with seemingly no chance of escape. This, to me, is a fate much worse than death. An absolute existential nightmare that I know I can't wake up from.
Any advice would be much appreciated. If there's any way to exit this world discretely, I'll gladly hear it out. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I know I can't stay. Thank you all in advance for understanding. <3
I am a 22-year-old (23 in June) autistic pansexual enby who is tired of living in a broken world that would prefer to see me dead anyway. My college education was a complete waste of time, and I have no career prospects whatsoever. Everything is going to get so much worse after this pandemic is over and I don't want to be around to see it. However, I am not in a position where CTB is viable since I live with my parents and I'm too scared to drive anywhere. I've even picked out a beautiful spot in nature near my home where I would like to die, but I have no way of getting there without arousing suspicion. Essentially, my circumstances have are forcing me to stay on this shithole planet until the bitter end, with seemingly no chance of escape. This, to me, is a fate much worse than death. An absolute existential nightmare that I know I can't wake up from.
Any advice would be much appreciated. If there's any way to exit this world discretely, I'll gladly hear it out. I don't know what I'm going to do, but I know I can't stay. Thank you all in advance for understanding. <3
