Today has been a bad day with more to come

[takemenowpls]

Today I woke up again just to simply exist nothing more. I don't work (can't) because of mental illness. My wife is now divorcing me so soon I will lose my home and insurance. I'm trying to look for any light at the end of the tunnel but I can't find it. I have no family and just one friend. 2 really but he is in another country. I keep asking, why keep going when there's nothing but more suffering on the way. I'm just so scared to try again based on my record of failure. Last thing I want is to be a vegetable on top of everything else. I'm so lost right now and alone. I keep looking at solutions then read about the chances of failing. Why must we be forced to suffer like this!

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand having the fear of failing ctb. It's just so terrifying that methods can go wrong and that is what keeps me here. A peaceful guaranteed exit from this life should be a human right, it really is unfair how suicide is this difficult. It's such a cruel existence and it does seem as though there is no relief from suffering. I'm sorry that you are going through all this. It sounds really tiring. Best wishes.

 

[darkwater]

Yes mental illness paralyzes you. I'm just sitting around without anything to do and I wonder how this will ever get better. One has no income and feels like a parasite. And the majority of the community thinks you are a freeloader.

 

[takemenowpls]

Exactly. Soon I'll have to go live with a friend after 19 years in this home. And I have 2 dogs to care for. I am thankful to be here though. Surrounded by people who face the same struggles I do. It truly gives me the strength I need knowing others are fighting too

 

[Lost Magic]

This life is so fucking fragile. It only takes one card to take down a whole deck. I can't wait for this torture to end.