doefauna
Member
- Aug 5, 2023
- 5
Everyone! I think I absolutely see this as a judgement free zone. I have no qualms about coming here and expressing myself without fear that I will be met with the disdain or unsatisfactory response of the real world. I don't have to think about how relationships will be affected or future consequences of my expression. And I also don't have to feel like I'm just talking to myself like when I vent in my notes app haha. I'd like you guys to respond with any opinions or thoughts you may have.
I find myself feeling pretty low recently, when this should be a time where things are okay. I've started higher education, I'm suppose to have a job tomorrow and I'm graduating from my bachelors program soon. Somehow I keep feeling anxious about what is to come. Like if I am going to fail. Last night was a horrible night. At first I couldn't sleep because my thoughts surrounding postgraduate classes and assignments were keeping me awake. During the night I had nightmares about I don't even remember what. Imposter syndrome is hitting me hard, and I feel like I have no one to talk to about it. The guy I'm "dating" doesn't seem like an option because he didn't want me to take up the job in the first place so I can't talk about my nerves surrounding my first day on the job tomorrow and if I'll be able to sustain it with school. I don't feel like I can talk to my mother or my one friend that I have. I tried utilising my universities free psychological services but the next available appt is oct 29th, for reference today is sept 14th…… so yea…. Very unhelpful….idk. I really hope that everything works out and it works out smoothly. Recently I've also been having to spend lots of money preparing for everything that's hapenning. University, new job, graduation, my birthday is also coming up. And I feel guilty that my mother has spent a good set of money on it too. I can't fail or it will be hell to pay heating from her about all she did for me only for me to waste her money and fail. Sigh oh boy. Lowkey id like to have a windfall of money that would last me the rest of my life so I could survive withought having the anxiety and stress of all these things that are hapenning. I don't want my anxiety to develop and become worse. I want to have high hopes about school and do well at my job so I can be properly paid. Sigh I'm scared y'all. All these new beginnings are very scary, and I feel like I have to face them on my own, the support is kind of lacking.
Anyways I guess I'm suppose to be grateful for all the new hapennings etc etc so maybe I'm just being bratty typing all this to youall having you read this. People have bigger issues. My comrades on here are facing direct thoughts of suicide, I shouldn't be complaining over moderate anxiety. I hope i actually get some sleep tonight and I don't have the nightmares again, I need all the rest I can get, having work early in the morning then class at night.
Im wishing all the best for everyone reading this. Drop a reaction if you made it this far
I find myself feeling pretty low recently, when this should be a time where things are okay. I've started higher education, I'm suppose to have a job tomorrow and I'm graduating from my bachelors program soon. Somehow I keep feeling anxious about what is to come. Like if I am going to fail. Last night was a horrible night. At first I couldn't sleep because my thoughts surrounding postgraduate classes and assignments were keeping me awake. During the night I had nightmares about I don't even remember what. Imposter syndrome is hitting me hard, and I feel like I have no one to talk to about it. The guy I'm "dating" doesn't seem like an option because he didn't want me to take up the job in the first place so I can't talk about my nerves surrounding my first day on the job tomorrow and if I'll be able to sustain it with school. I don't feel like I can talk to my mother or my one friend that I have. I tried utilising my universities free psychological services but the next available appt is oct 29th, for reference today is sept 14th…… so yea…. Very unhelpful….idk. I really hope that everything works out and it works out smoothly. Recently I've also been having to spend lots of money preparing for everything that's hapenning. University, new job, graduation, my birthday is also coming up. And I feel guilty that my mother has spent a good set of money on it too. I can't fail or it will be hell to pay heating from her about all she did for me only for me to waste her money and fail. Sigh oh boy. Lowkey id like to have a windfall of money that would last me the rest of my life so I could survive withought having the anxiety and stress of all these things that are hapenning. I don't want my anxiety to develop and become worse. I want to have high hopes about school and do well at my job so I can be properly paid. Sigh I'm scared y'all. All these new beginnings are very scary, and I feel like I have to face them on my own, the support is kind of lacking.
Anyways I guess I'm suppose to be grateful for all the new hapennings etc etc so maybe I'm just being bratty typing all this to youall having you read this. People have bigger issues. My comrades on here are facing direct thoughts of suicide, I shouldn't be complaining over moderate anxiety. I hope i actually get some sleep tonight and I don't have the nightmares again, I need all the rest I can get, having work early in the morning then class at night.
Im wishing all the best for everyone reading this. Drop a reaction if you made it this far
