Thinking about death all the time

[Jinny]

When I'm with people, I try to think of a random topic to ramble about, but then it occurs to me that all I ever think about is death and my self-hatred. It's ridiculous; I feel as if I've lost all creativity and that my brain is rotting away. I know I won't have to deal with these feelings for long because I'll ctb in a few months, but it still upsets me that I've become this kind of person.

What goes through your head all day?

 

[BeansOfRequirement]

What goes through your head all day?

 

[FuneralCry]

All I think about is death as well. It is the only thing I want, to not exist. I am not meant for this world and nothing about life interests me. My life is so depressing and empty and all I want is to be free from it.
I constantly overthink everything and I find it really hard to concentrate. I really have nothing to live for, it is all so pointless.

 

[clown_17]

Same. It's getting in the way of my life. I can't engage in anything but thinking about ctb. I think it's because our brains can't handle real life anymore so we become obsessed with the only way out.

 

[wanttodie]

me 24- 7

 

[Crazy4u]

I'm on the same boat. I completely gave up on life. I don't care about anything anymore. I wish I could just disappear

 

[lofticries]

fuck,tumblr won't let me post my original comment.

oh well its pretty much an everyday occurrence thinking about ctb/death in general. On the REALLY rare occasion it isn't its me doing a countdown till something fucks up in my life which triggers those thoughts again. I'm basically a prisoner inside my own head.

 

[Amumu]

I think about it all the time and I think I'm going to do it very soon because it's unbearable.

If it pleases people, good for them.

 

[agate]

Same. Plus I wish I was in my 80s/90s , that would be more tolerable. I feel life is so unfair. There are so many people who want to live (as unbelievable as that is) , and yet they may be terminal and we have to continue our sentence

 

[Jumping_realms]

I am absolutely in misery 24/7 and no one but us could ever fathom the degree it can be.

I do not care what family/friends will feel when I CTB, they don't understand the severity anyway. I can "read" people well enough to tell.

 

[orangepotato]

I just want the sweet relief of death already. I want to leave this horrible world and never ever come back.