The time is coming and im scared of chickening out again

[Canttakeitanymore]

Fuck this weird feeling

 

[fred farkle]

if you chicken out,thats fine.just means you dont want to do it today.

 

[HarpoMarx]

If you allow me to ask... Why do you "chicken out"? What comes to your mind in that precise moment? Is it just fear to death, dying, what you leave behind, what could be, or something else?

I know i would chicken out because im afraid of dying. Im not afraid of death tho. I just want to put down to sleep like on my last appendix surgery. I dont remember anything.

 

[Canttakeitanymore]

If you allow me to ask... Why do you "chicken out"? What comes to your mind in that precise moment? Is it just fear to death, dying, what you leave behind, what could be, or something else?

I know i would chicken out because im afraid of dying. Im not afraid of death tho. I just want to put down to sleep like on my last appendix surgery. I dont remember anything.

My mind tricks me into thinking that maybe things are going to change (they never do), fear of failing and becoming disable, fear of going to hell seeing demons and dumb shit like that, also that weird feeling of realizing i will never actually feel the relief from ending it, i will never feel anything ever again cease to exist forever for all eternity millions billions of years, yeah i know its like before being born but its still a weird feeling

 

[HarpoMarx]

My mind tricks me into thinking that maybe things are going to change (they never do), fear of failing and becoming disable, fear of going to hell seeing demons and dumb shit like that, also that weird feeling of realizing i will never actually feel the relief from ending it, i will never feel anything ever again cease to exist forever for all eternity millions billions of years, yeah i know its like before being born but its still a weird feeling

Thanks for replying me..it all makes totally sense to me :). Good luck in whatever decision you make.