I have been in this world far too long. From the age of 12 or so, I have had suicidal thoughts, ideation and tendencies combined with depression, anxiety and I'm sure other undiagnosed issues. I have a loving close family, and because of not wanting to hurt them, I have stayed for years and years past when I should have ended my life. I have finally reached the end of my rope. The pain is too much. The depression and anxiety is too much. The world is too much. My relationship and it's issues are too much. The pandemic was too much. Everything is too much. I have let a million times pass over the years where I should and could have ended my life. I have never felt more confident and commited to taking my own life as I do now. And I will, because I have to. I want to. I don't know how quickly it will happen, hopefully sooner than later. But this is the last year of my life. I know I have said that every year in the past ... this time is different, this time I mean it and this time it will be. Am I sorry for the family I leave behind and the people that care? Kind of. But they've gotten a lot of extra years out of me that shouldn't have been. Finally, I am putting me first. For once in my life, I am putting me first and I will let nothing stand in my way this time. I will achieve death. I will achieve peace. I will commit suicide and I will be a proud suicide statistic. Bring on death. Bring on peace. Bring on non-existence,
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I understand, I hope we both can find peace.
FuneralCry
Just wanting some peace
- Sep 24, 2020
- 48,669
Nobody should have to live a life filled with suffering. I feel like I've been alive too long and the thought of death comforts me. In this life there is no limit as to how bad things can get and the idea of permanent peace is a wonderful one, I know how you feel.
Agreed, all I want is permanent peace. We all deserve that. I have been alive wayyy too long, it's finally getting to be my time to shine and end my suffering. I can't wait tbh
WornOutLife
マット
- Mar 22, 2020
- 7,183
I've been suicidal since I was 12 too. (goddamn high school!)
Hope we can be at peace some day.
Hugs and love,
Matt
It's a never ending cycle that never goes away. I will hopefully be at peace soon or within this year, hopefully you can also find your peace.
Hopefully I will be soon, within the year at the very latest, hopefully within the next few months. I am fully commited now.
moonangel18
Member
- Mar 10, 2020
- 22
Always nice to know we're not alone in our thoughts, I can't wait for my moment to shine and ctb, I wish you peace whatever you choose friend
insanedoomer
Zé"HaZarD
- Jan 10, 2021
- 244
" speaking my mind " , hope y'll find peace .Last edited:
We all deserve peace, hope you find it as well.
moonangel18
Member
- Mar 10, 2020
- 22
I'm planning to CTB this week. I hope to have the courage to do it already and not let my SI kick in.
I completely understand, SI is a bitch. It's taken me so long to get to this point of feeling like I'm past the point of no return, and it's a great feeling, but it's still easier said than done. If you choose to go this week, I send you courage and peace friend.
The Mute Viking
α †⊕r†⊕urεd p⊕εâ€
- Oct 10, 2018
- 206
Relatable af.
Wish there was a place just for us suicidal people to all meet up and live in a world where we can all build a paradise.
Silly dreams am I right? :(
Not silly at all. I think there is paradise for all of us suicidal people, but to get there, we have to ctb, then we can hang out with all the other suicide souls who have gone before us and party in our peaceful abyss of nothingness. :)
The Mute Viking
α †⊕r†⊕urεd p⊕εâ€
- Oct 10, 2018
- 206
Well I hope that if there is a place for us suicidal people, I hope that it's a place of love, light and where our wildest dreams are made reality in this afterlife.
And where we call can remember where we came from and that we never hurt each other.
I don't believe in an afterlife, it's hard to logically believe in such a fairy tale place.
But my heart hopes for it. I want to see all you beautiful fucks there and those I've lost to suicide.
I love you guys so much and I wish I could be a real person in your lifes. But I'm just one damaged lady hurting alongside you all.
That would be absolutely awesome and wonderous, that is the definition of paradise. I also don't believe in an afterlife either, it is really hard to logically believe that. I hope that when I pull the trigger it's just instant blackness and nothingness tbh I'm new here, but I love everyone and feel the same way, it's too bad we have to be here, but I am glad it is here. Hugs to you, we all hurt so much and we all deserve peace.
The Mute Viking
α †⊕r†⊕urεd p⊕εâ€
- Oct 10, 2018
- 206
You're a sweet soul. I wish the best for you, whatever that may be.
You guys are definitely in my suicide letter.Similar threads
- taker_of_insulin
- Suicide Discussion
Suicide Discussiontaker_of_insulin
