Discussion So I've unofficially committed suicide. Now what?

[StarryEyed]

So I've unofficially committed suicide by doing the following ....

I've set up care directives that are now in force with my medical team of:
*No CPR
*No tests - not even blood work
*No treatment - other than what I ask for (which is only to prevent further suffering)

I have also set up advance directives that come into force if I cannot express my wishes and if I am suffering from an incurable disease. I have asked for absolutely no tests and no treatment other than water and pain killers.

I have also set up advance directives that come into force if I am suffering from an illness to the point of dependence and cannot express myself. They are to kill me through euthanasia.

I have also confirmed with my family doctor that if and when I qualify for euthanasia with a sound frame of mind, she will sign the papers to approve.

I have told close family members and friends.

Based on these measures and my health, I am likely to last a maximum of three years.

So now what? As you can imagine, to bring me to this point, I'm so fucking done. I'm seething at the teeth. Heartbroken. Destroyed. My emotional and mental and physical pains are unbearable. I fucking hate my life and this world. They can't take me soon enough. So how do I survive in this world when I've already checked out? No one IRL around me can relate to where I'm at. Hopefully someone here can advise me. Mind you, I wouldn't wish understanding on anybody, of course.

Thanks in advance for any insights and guidance.

 

[Shiitake]

I'd go to beaches alot

 

[StarryEyed]

I'd go to beaches alot

Yes! I can barely walk, but I bought shoes to walk along the shore of the beach. I'm waiting for a day that I can walk a little.

Thank you.
My question means not just activities but how do I interact with people? It's another world now. I've said goodbye to everyone now.

 

[StarryEyed]

Here are my water shoes