anna-morphosis
Member
- Jun 19, 2019
- 23
i don't remember much of my dream from last night but i remember how it ended. it was a sudden shift in tone and i woke up with a start right after. i was out walking with a pretty random person from my past, someone i went to middle school with. in the dream world, things seemed mostly fine and we were just hanging out. but out of nowhere she stopped me and said very sternly, "i don't want to get a call telling me that you died. okay? you won't do that?" and it was like everything came crashing down and i started to remember who i was in real life. i just responded with "o-okay" before everything kind of dissolved and i was awake again.
it's made me feel really weird today. it's like remembering too much of the feeling of what it used to be like when i had connections in my life that mattered to me, and they stopped me from being serious about dying. i don't have them anymore, but they still haunt me. just the fact that i ever experienced that at all is enough to make all of this harder.
this isn't the first time it's felt like my dreams were expressing some kind of survival instinct to me. i've had a lot of dreams recently that loosely follow the scenario "everything gets better and i go on with my life after this period" even if almost all of them have been pretty incoherent in terms of what actually happens. it's really weird to me that it's like there's a will to live buried somewhere in my unconscious that i can't really access at all during my waking life. normally, it's not too hard to shrug that off, but this last dream shook me somewhat.
it's made me feel really weird today. it's like remembering too much of the feeling of what it used to be like when i had connections in my life that mattered to me, and they stopped me from being serious about dying. i don't have them anymore, but they still haunt me. just the fact that i ever experienced that at all is enough to make all of this harder.
this isn't the first time it's felt like my dreams were expressing some kind of survival instinct to me. i've had a lot of dreams recently that loosely follow the scenario "everything gets better and i go on with my life after this period" even if almost all of them have been pretty incoherent in terms of what actually happens. it's really weird to me that it's like there's a will to live buried somewhere in my unconscious that i can't really access at all during my waking life. normally, it's not too hard to shrug that off, but this last dream shook me somewhat.
