saying goodbye

[Deltawaves74]

i had a chat with my one and only sorta friend, she is an amazing person, cares and doesnt judge me and is funny and i love her loads. she knows i cant go like this but she would not agree to me ctb purely coz she tries to see a way tries to be positive although i think after the last year i think she knows its gonna happen. i made sure she knows how much i appreciate and care for her and if something happens that it isnt her fault she tried her best.
it just all sucks, im gonna hurt and let down the only person who i care about , someone who would never hurt me.
it makes me a piece of shit to leave coz i cant take the agony anymore but to leave someone with pain, its just shit.

 

[WornOutLife]

That's why ctb is so difficult and kinda a selfish act.
We gotta ignore the fact of how much we love friends, family, etc and go for it.

When I failed at ctb last August. I remember crying lots while writing my goodbye letters and taking pills.