Venting Rope

[morningdew]

I finally get why so many just get a rope and do it. There is not an easy way. This was my first optioned I explored a couple years ago but have tried to live the last couple years hoping health issue would improve. At one point in my research this past year, I thought N from A was the answer. Then to find out you may or may not get it and the bottle may or may not be sealed. Of course there is the issue you can't drink it with out days of taking other meds. Always liked the Nitrogen/exitbag. Easy to get everything but found the gas in the tank was around 97%, at best 98 percent. Yes, I bought that tester listed in PPHB. Even if I did trust it's accuracy, it showed it going between 97-98 %. Maybe it would work if all goes right. I know the pphb says you need at least 98% so yeah, maybe it would. Test run just left me feeling ill and coughing for a week or two. Who knows what toxic shit is mixed or in the tank. Partial hanging try was interesting. Had a drink and some benzos, felt like my own little last day party. Placed the rope around my neck and said to myself "this is it". I guess the SI kicked it and I pulled it off my neck before passing Then passed out in bed. Woke up 12 hours later and couldn't hold my head up for a few days. either from all the benzos or the muscles in my neck getting tweaked, who knows. Very strange week afterwards. I hate being back in this mental space where I wish it all would end but know I don't have what it take at this point to go through with any method.

 

[theguineapigking]

I'm really sorry. You've been through some rough stuff.


I myself plan to do partial. All the drug stuff seems so complicated and annoying to Obtain. I have a 10mm rope. I think it's pretty efficient if you can get past the panic.


I totally get that it's scary to go through with it. You're definitely not alone there. That's why so many people drink alcohol or get drugged up if they can. I think that being relaxed and in the right mindset can really help to go through with it.


What health problems do you have? Is there anyone that you can lean on? Family? Friends?

If you want to talk about anything,feel free to message me. I'm here for you.

 

[morningdew]

Thank you for your response. Health stuff is kinda a long story. Multiple issues that limit my life and emotionally drain me many days. I know others on here may have even worse issues. Just hard to finds reasons to even try to live sometimes. I stay optimistic for awhile then reality of knowing death may be my only place of peace. This forum is about my only support. Only keep in contact with one family member. Friends have faded away as I just not the same on any level