Venting Relapse every time things go wrong

[CrazyMary]

I was feeling pretty well the second semester of last year, I might dare to say even optimistic about the future. Since then things just got back to hell. I broke up with my partner which wasn´t a bad idea but still hurt. Then most of the few work leads have gone almost all to hell. I have no energy or will to keep fighting for it. Today I just received news that I lost an important trial (the one that caused this downward spiral). I am still going to appeal and still have a little hope. I know that if things go wrong I could be able to pay the worst case scenario but still I am extremely mad and sad with this world. Things just keep getting harder and I am more frustrated with less energy. I will try to stick around until the end of the appeal but man this is getting harder. FOr a few moments I was just thinking of going to the building I have already thought about jumping 13 floors so no survival chance. This world sucks, it´s hard to be optimstic.

I was taking 11 pills at one moment, halcion,rivotril, antidepressant, seroquel and a bunch more. Now I am almost clean just taking a quarter of the smallest paxil, I don´t want to take stuff again, I just want to either things work or just get the hell out of this planet.

 

[Brianiskillingme]

I relapse with depression and my BPD as soon as things go wrong for me too. This world sucks and so do a lot of people.

 

[picklemick]

I relapse with depression and my BPD as soon as things go wrong for me too. This world sucks and so do a lot of people.

Would love to chat about BPD. I feel like this is me even though im not diagnosed and is starting to explain a lot.

 

[meganblask22]

I need out now. Several failed attempts. Please help me escape this nightmare.

 

[FuneralCry]

To me life really is so horrifying, as even if things are going well for someone, all that can quickly change. The future is unpredictable and uncertain and things could easily get so much worse. I understand why you would be frustrated. As humans there is only so much that we can take before we become desperate to leave. I hope that in whatever happens, you find relief from your suffering.