Recovery guilt

[Life_and_Death]

Maybe it's just me because of the way I feel about my disorders but "good days", working towards recovery, idk it just seems like "look you can get better. Nothing is/was wrong". Which just makes me feel worse and makes me want to completely abort recovery and just kms.

I don't fucking get it. Why do I feel like this is all a lie if I can't just make it stop? I can logically tell myself 'your life sucks' and yet still I feel like I'm overreacting, followed by burying it deeper, and making it worse.

 

[timf]

There can be many different reasons for self-sabotage. When you see it happening and you know it is a distortion, you might be able to push through by clinging to what you know is true. It can also be useful to cultivate a little anger to help muster the motivation to push back.

Feelings are useful when they allow you to enjoy life or alert you to a condition that needs attention (like a smoke detector). If you feelings are trying to invalidate your "good days", you might beat them back with the truth that you are having some success.

It sounds like you are making progress and should be proud of it.

 

[Life_and_Death]

It sounds like you are making progress and should be proud of it.

Both.... I don't feel bad and at the same time praying I was dead