Rather CTB by yourself or with a partner?

[Mothz]

If by yourself, why? Likewise, if with a partner, why? Would it have to be a romantic partner, a friend of yours, or anyone?

 

[zoeTDavies98]

By myself, I don't know how I would involve someone else even though that may be comforting

 

[Parasitism]

I'd ctb by myself for the same reasons I live life by myself. I'm unable to feel meaningful connections. It makes socialising performative and exhausting. The thought of having to socially perform in my final moments seems pointless.

 

[overmorrow]

as long as I die 100% it really doesn't matter

 

[Gangrel]

Me on the suicide group: are you guys mad at me

 

[Mothz]

Interesting. It seems I am in the minority. Personally, I want to ctb with a romantic partner. I feel as though it will make the whole process easier for both parties and also provide companionship during their last moments. I am also fine with being someone's "trip sitter" person, where I watch over them and provide my support during their last moments. I don't think anyone deserves to go out sad and alone not by choice

 

[cheaptrick]

I'd ctb by myself for the same reasons I live life by myself. I'm unable to feel meaningful connections. It makes socialising performative and exhausting. The thought of having to socially perform in my final moments seems pointless.

I couldn't have said it better myself.

 

[TwistedNightmares]

By myself. I don't feel comfortable around other people.

 

[nendn]

Me on the suicide group: are you guys mad at me

speaking for myself even if i do not understand your question and in context but i am not mad at you , be well love

 

[LunarLynx]

I would love to do it with someone, not really a romantic partner or anything, but I've been alone most of my life, so if I could die not alone it would be great..

 

[MyLastTour]

I guess it depends on how I'd go. I've only ever really thought of doing it by myself since a partner was never an option. I'm not sure I'd be okay with putting such a heavy psychological burden on someone. It is selfish, but the type of person I'd be want to CTB with is also the type of person I wish could stay here to help people, and they're not someone I want to haunt with my memory. So I suppose I'll have to leave by myself if it ever comes to that.

 

[daydreamer52]

Interesting. It seems I am in the minority. Personally, I want to ctb with a romantic partner. I feel as though it will make the whole process easier for both parties and also provide companionship during their last moments. I am also fine with being someone's "trip sitter" person, where I watch over them and provide my support during their last moments. I don't think anyone deserves to go out sad and alone not by choice

Id also rather do it with a romantic partner, but I've never had one since I've never been loved by someone who's not blood-related, so I have to do it alone

 

[enough of this]

Alone. Which is the reason I would CTB, anyway.

 

[enough of this]

Me on the suicide group: are you guys mad at me

NO! Not at all.

 

[orvreader]

I used to have a male friend with which we promised each other not to die before the other and that we can only die simultaneously. But I ended up getting too attached to him as he was my only friend while I wasn't even his closest friend, so I ended up cutting him off; I convinced myself was for self-respect purposes, but I think I was more insecure than anything, and I still can't help but to regret cutting him off, really; he was the closest friend I ever had ever since my best friend died of cancer in primary school haha. But well anyway, that's why I wouldn't like having a seatmate on the bus, as it'd just remind me of him lol.

 

[itsgone2]

My current method is fsh but I've always been tempted by co. I think it would be easier to attempt that with someone. Not necessarily romantic. Or SN. Seems like a partner would help brave it. Fsh or gun, which I've also thought about, seem better alone.

 

[pokerrkitty]

I think a partner would be good. Would make me less likely to back out.

 

[Forever Sleep]

By myself. I think I'd feel more nervous having someone else there. They'd likely be a friend or stranger though. I don't have a romantic partner. I suppose even if I did, I'd struggle- if both of us were reasonably healthy. Would I truly believe all was lost for them, would they for me? Besides, I'm struggling as it is to put my Dad through my suicide. I don't feel like I can. I imagine I'd feel the same way towards a partner. Whether I felt better or not. Maybe if we were both old and ailing- that would be easier to envisage.

The other not impossible scenario would be aiding a close friend or relative. That would be after pursuing assisted suicide I imagine though. If they truly were suffering that badly and there truly was no other way- I don't know. I almost hope I would have the bravery and compassion to 'help' them. I doubt I could go with them though. I doubt they'd accept my suicide. I'd more likely have to help them first then, go afterwards. So that I don't end up in jail partly too.

 

[darksouls]

with a partner because I am afraid of a failed attempt and to overcome SI

 

[spiders.in.my.head]

alone, because while i imagine it'd be comforting to not be alone as you're dying, it would be more difficult to plan with a partner, and if one of you fails, it's also a shitton of legal trouble.

 

[enditplz]

Alone. When I ctb, I want to do it cause I am 100% ready to go. With a partner there's the added pressure, so you might cause them to do it when they're not ready or vice versa.

 

[Forveleth]

Spent my entire existence centering my life around everyone else. I will be damned if my death is going to be the same. Going out alone on my terms when I want, where I want, how I want.

 

[ih34rty0u]

im scared that one of us would survive and end up traumatized so i'd rather go by myself

 

[scordatura]

Alone. Because if there was someone I was comfortable enough to die with, perhaps I would want to live just to experience them first.

 

[birthdayboy]

By myself in nature with no pressure whatsoever. Just one single moment of peace before vanishing.

 

[BrighterMoon]

If by yourself, why? Likewise, if with a partner, why? Would it have to be a romantic partner, a friend of yours, or anyone?

If I could do it with someone who was supportive, I would much rather do it that way. They wouldn't have to do it as well, unless they're in a similar place as myself and would equally benefit from it but that is their decision, but really I would just like someone to be there so I don't have to be alone, so I can feel at peace and comforted hopefully, so they can help me if I can't do it myself, and if we were both doing it then it would be mutual. It could be anyone, even someone I don't know for any other purpose than to do it together or for them to help me, but it would be better for me than doing it alone... I've been alone too much as it is

 

[burninghill]

I've been lucky enough to be in more than one scenario where I was in a position to kill myself with a partner. At the time, I thought that it was what I wanted and that if I had a partner it would be easier, but instead I just felt a lot of pressure. I kind of was scared of being held accountable? I didn't like the idea that if I backed out then it would be my fault, or that I couldn't back out at all.

If I was going to go with a partner, it would have to be somebody I truly deeply felt connected to. Like, I'd want to really feel in my soul that CTB together is *right* and I want to care about their relief and really want the best for them. I like the idea of encouraging each other through SI and having somebody to lean on emotionally whilst building up to death.
I have a really hard time properly caring about people and having deeply connected relationships, so what maybe sounds normal to others feels unattainable/ desirable to me.
The only people who have offered to kill themselves with me were people I weren't very close with (I've also had an offer that I wasn't convinced was serious).

TL;DR: yeah I'd maybe CTB with a partner, preferably romantic.

I think a partner would be good. Would make me less likely to back out.

This was my thinking when I was heavily considering going with a partner.

 

[Happy Cat]

Interesting. It seems I am in the minority. Personally, I want to ctb with a romantic partner. I feel as though it will make the whole process easier for both parties and also provide companionship during their last moments. I am also fine with being someone's "trip sitter" person, where I watch over them and provide my support during their last moments. I don't think anyone deserves to go out sad and alone not by choice

I am too :/
I rather die with a romantic partner, I don't want to die without ever being loved

 

[Fresh Soju]

I am too :/
I rather die with a romantic partner, I don't want to die without ever being loved

I'd also want one. Not to glamorize them, but having seen a lot of couple/partner/with friends suicide videos compared to solo suicides, the ones where people do them together are way more peaceful to watch, and they seem less brutal as well.
Only tragic downside can be when one has SI and wants to stop going through the act, but the other person will then drag them into it, but I suppose that might be a plus for some people. Something to be talked about prior to at least imo.

 

[urgent]

Spent my entire existence centering my life around everyone else. I will be damned if my death is going to be the same. Going out alone on my terms when I want, where I want, how I want.

Did you decide where,when and how yet?.