Preparations have started

[NotGoodEnough]

Hello, everyone. I haven't been an active member of this forum for quite some time, and even when I was, I only mostly lurked. I have decided to become more proactive in talking to you guys, who understand me, know the way I feel, and can empathize.

I have started my preparations. I ordered SN online and successfully contacted D for N. However, I'm likely to fail, as I still live with my parents in spite of being over 18 years old. They're also very aware of my mental health conditions, and I have already failed an attempt once before. In short, I'm likely to fail again, but I'm desperate enough to try nevertheless.

I'll be documenting my progress with you guys. If I do end up succeeding in taking N or SN, I will post a pre-written message the moment I swallow the substance, consisting of my goodbyes and info about which substance I took. At the very least, if you guys never hear from me again, you'll know whether N from D is legit or if SN really works, Idk.

As of this moment, the mere possibility of succeeding makes me feel EUPHORIC. I haven't felt this happy in years. It's exhilarating. I really want to die. All hesitation vanished the moment I decided to go through with this. I'm glad, really. That's how I've felt the entire day.

Hopefully, it will all be over in the next couple of weeks.

I hope we can all find peace.
Much love,
L.

 

[tranquilityseeker]

All the best. Hope you're able to ctb successfully.

Please also look into antiemticsz angelics, benzodiazepine & other drugs as it reduces discomfort if possible.

 

[Euthanza]

Good luck and wish you the most peaceful of your final days

 

[hellispink]

Wishing you a peaceful and nice trip.

 

[LeavingEarly]

Hello, everyone. I haven't been an active member of this forum for quite some time, and even when I was, I only mostly lurked. I have decided to become more proactive in talking to you guys, who understand me, know the way I feel, and can empathize.

I have started my preparations. I ordered SN online and successfully contacted D for N. However, I'm likely to fail, as I still live with my parents in spite of being over 18 years old. They're also very aware of my mental health conditions, and I have already failed an attempt once before. In short, I'm likely to fail again, but I'm desperate enough to try nevertheless.

I'll be documenting my progress with you guys. If I do end up succeeding in taking N or SN, I will post a pre-written message the moment I swallow the substance, consisting of my goodbyes and info about which substance I took. At the very least, if you guys never hear from me again, you'll know whether N from D is legit or if SN really works, Idk.

As of this moment, the mere possibility of succeeding makes me feel EUPHORIC. I haven't felt this happy in years. It's exhilarating. I really want to die. All hesitation vanished the moment I decided to go through with this. I'm glad, really. That's how I've felt the entire day.

Hopefully, it will all be over in the next couple of weeks.

I hope we can all find peace.
Much love,
L.

Are you afraid to die at all?

 

[NotGoodEnough]

Are you afraid to die at all?

No, I'm not. Sure, there's the possibility that my rock-solid belief that death ends all of our pain might be wrong, but I'm willing to take the risk. I philosophically consider death to be a preferable alternative to life, so I'm not afraid. I'm anxious. I'm eager. I want it to arrive as soon as possible.

On another note, are you afraid to die? If so, know that the feeling is completely normal. We're here if you ever need to vent.

 

[FuneralCry]

It is understandable why you would be so relieved at the thought of your life ending. In my opinion, there is nothing better than permanently ceasing to exist. The thought of being dead is very comforting to me. Those who have the option of N and SN are certainly lucky. Best wishes.

 

[1000winds]

goodluck @NotGoodEnough

 

[LeavingEarly]

No, I'm not. Sure, there's the possibility that my rock-solid belief that death ends all of our pain might be wrong, but I'm willing to take the risk. I philosophically consider death to be a preferable alternative to life, so I'm not afraid. I'm anxious. I'm eager. I want it to arrive as soon as possible.

On another note, are you afraid to die? If so, know that the feeling is completely normal. We're here if you ever need to vena

Yeah the unknown of death gives me anxiety and fear. I think thats why I havent been able to successfully hang myself. I am pretty sure death is like before being alive or like when you are under anathesia just nothing.

 

[NotGoodEnough]

Yeah the unknown of death gives me anxiety and fear. I think thats why I havent been able to successfully hang myself. I am pretty sure death is like before being alive or like when you are under anathesia just nothing.

That's completely ok. Death is the biggest unknown there is, and there's no shame in being afraid of that. I will agree with you that death is just like an eternal sleep where we don't wake up; in fact, I'm betting everything on it.

Don't hesitate to reach out if you need to talk. I'll still be around for a while.

 

[virgilwalks]

We are here if you want to share & talk.