Pregnant by surprise at 41

[Final Escape]

I feel like this is a joke right now. I find out today at clinic that I'm 4 and a half weeks pregnant by this guy I don't even like but felt pressured to have sex with. It's complicated. I feel a mix of happy but bc the circumstances really sad. I'm kind of hoping I will miscarry do to my age. I don't have the heart to abort another pregnancy after having had 4 abortions in my 20's

 

[Sidestep]

That's rough, I can't even begin to imagine how hard this must be for you. Do you have plans for what to do in case you don't miscarry?

 

[Tiburcio]

I don't have the heart to abort another pregnancy

Why you can't?

 

[SamK]

I feel like this is a joke right now. I find out today at clinic that I'm 4 and a half weeks pregnant by this guy I don't even like but felt pressured to have sex with. It's complicated. I feel a mix of happy but bc the circumstances really sad. I'm kind of hoping I will miscarry do to my age. I don't have the heart to abort another pregnancy after having had 4 abortions in my 20's

Big hugs to you final escape

That must be so tough for you right now, i cant imagine, i'm sorry.
If you really couldn't go through with the abortion just remember there are options for adoption. Its probably all too much to think about i know :(
Please just dont feel guilty, no matter what you feel you need. No guilt. It is your choice.

((Warm hugs))

 

[Volatile]

Doesn't this give you incentive to ctb sooner?

 

[BlackDragonof1989]

Oh dear, I am sorry for this complicated situation, it is indeed bittersweet.

 

[OfficerK]

Not aborting the child would be incredibly irresponsible in my opinion. You should really take some time to consider the consequences of what you're doing.

 

[IG959]

Why you can't?

They are extremely traumatic to go through

I feel like this is a joke right now. I find out today at clinic that I'm 4 and a half weeks pregnant by this guy I don't even like but felt pressured to have sex with. It's complicated. I feel a mix of happy but bc the circumstances really sad. I'm kind of hoping I will miscarry do to my age. I don't have the heart to abort another pregnancy after having had 4 abortions in my 20's

Have you thought about adoption or if there's someone who's be willing to look after if you don't miscarry?

 

[hopeis5427]

My ex-friends mother had her at 40

 

[Tiburcio]

Not aborting the child would be incredibly irresponsible in my opinion. You should really take some time to consider the consequences of what you're doing.

Exactly.

Sometimes I think people see inmoral things that they aren't like abortion being compared with murdering, which is stupid and a harmful point of view.

I hate the way persons see life, valuing quantity (more lifes here) over quantity (nobody cares about how fucked that kids will be if they aren't aborted)

Abortion is not a mistake, and giving him to adoption will be as awful for him as doing he grow by yourself but unwished.

Please consider things and don't let him to have a life and even less in a situation like this, because YOU will have a lot of problems for keeping the kid alive, a lot of energy and money spent, and if you have depression or anxiety, it's NOT good for you: both will be extremely harmed of it.

Why giving he in adoption when you can abort and saving inmediately a lot of bad things instead of giving him a crap life? Please consider things. Don't let him face that awful reality which life will be for him.

They are extremely traumatic to go through

More traumas will face the child.

 

[Final Escape]

Doesn't this give you incentive to ctb sooner?

U would think it would, it actually makes u want to continue bc u have a baby on the way.

 

[Final Escape]

Exactly.

Sometimes I think people see inmoral things that they aren't like abortion being compared with murdering, which is stupid and a harmful point of view.

I hate the way persons see life, valuing quantity (more lifes here) over quantity (nobody cares about how fucked that kids will be if they aren't aborted)

Abortion is not a mistake, and giving him to adoption will be as awful for him as doing he grow by yourself but unwished.

Please consider things and don't let him to have a life and even less in a situation like this, because YOU will have a lot of problems for keeping the kid alive, a lot of energy and money spent, and if you have depression or anxiety, it's NOT good for you: both will be extremely harmed of it.

Why giving he in adoption when you can abort and saving inmediately a lot of bad things instead of giving him a crap life? Please consider things. Don't let him face that awful reality which life will be for him.


More traumas will face the child.

I will probably give up for adoption. Kids generally turn out just as good from a two parent adoptive home as they would with two bio parents. The main thing of importance is that u need the two parents, intact home.

 

[throwaway123]

I find out today at clinic that I'm 4 and a half weeks pregnant by this guy I don't even like but felt pressured to have sex with.

What do you mean "pressured to have sex with"?

If I were you I'd abort it. And why do you feel happy? How could you? How could bringing a child into a world full of suffering make you happy?

Adoption is the worst. Please just abort it.

 

[Final Escape]

I wish I could sell the kid to a couple of my choosing, leave the state out lol! That would be awesome, collect like 50,000 for my efforts. But no, the state gets the biggest cut.

 

[Final Escape]

Babies have never been more unsafe in the womb since the legalization and normalization of abortion. I just can't murder again unless the baby is messed up. It is murder ok. It is a human being, I realize we live in a culture that worships death now but I just can't do it.

 

[throwaway123]

I wish I could sell the kid to a couple of my choosing, leave the state out lol! That would be awesome, collect like 50,000 for my efforts. But no, the state gets the biggest cut.

"Sell" your kid"??????? Now I'm dumbfounded.

 

[OfficerK]

I will probably give up for adoption. Kids generally turn out just as good from a two parent adoptive home as they would with two bio parents. The main thing of importance is that u need the two parents, intact home.

That's probably better than keeping the child considering your condition. However, the combination of the fact that you're older than 40 and that you seemingly have a history of mental illness leaves the child with an unfortunately high chance of developing some sort of disorder. The likelihood of chromosome defects increases significantly with maternal age, and the same goes for developmental disorders such as autism. It is also known that many mental disorders have a high rate of heritability.

 

[Final Escape]

"Sell" your kid"??????? Now I'm dumbfounded.

Why is this so hard to conceive? The only thing that changes between the state involvement is that it makes it harder for me to benefit from giving the child up for adoption. Why do u think it's a problem that women would get compensated directly for giving a child to a good family? Adoption through state just makes it harder for people to adopt and makes the woman get less compensation. The state is more interested in creation of single mothers or dead babies.

 

[OfficerK]

Babies have never been more unsafe in the womb since the legalization and normalization of abortion. I just can't murder again unless the baby is messed up. It is murder ok. It is a human being, I realize we live in a culture that worships death now but I just can't do it.

What makes you think that you have the right to force life upon someone but not to take it from them?

Besides, exactly how do you define murder? Is it just that you consider the bereavement of potential life as murder? Do you think that there's something holy/special about life that denies you the right to meddle with it? I'm interested to know.

 

[Tiburcio]

Babies have never been more unsafe in the womb since the legalization and normalization of abortion. I just can't murder again unless the baby is messed up. It is murder ok. It is a human being, I realize we live in a culture that worships death now but I just can't do it.

I'm not trying to make feel pressed nobody, but it's not murder. They are variated arguments against that but once the kid is over the legal age and gave in adoption, nobody gives a fuck about the son anymore. It's tragic. And abortion is a solution for situations like this. Don't worry, there is nothing wrong in it, don't feel so bad with yourself for doing it, ut's not a crime and it shouldn't be so criticized, and you neither.

Also, once it's done you have one less worry. Your situation doesn't seem good for having a baby.

Even if it's murder, it's still better than a extremely hard and messed up life like he will have.

 

[Volatile]

I will probably give up for adoption. Kids generally turn out just as good from a two parent adoptive home as they would with two bio parents. The main thing of importance is that u need the two parents, intact home.

This world is Hell. Why would you bring a child into this shithole? There's no guarantee the child will be adopted. The kid could end up in foster care and then dumped into the cold, hard world at 18

 

[throwaway123]

Babies have never been more unsafe in the womb since the legalization and normalization of abortion. I just can't murder again unless the baby is messed up. It is murder ok. It is a human being, I realize we live in a culture that worships death now but I just can't do it.

Do you mean us, the people here that have been suffering for their entire lives desperate for an escape?
We don't worship death, we don't worship anything. Period. We want to end our suffering and the only permanent way to do that is death. Suicide is a process that takes many years sometimes decades to complete. It is not an action. If you really think about us in this way I think it's best if you just leave this website and never come back again.

Go live your live with the values you perceive to be correct. But know this. For every amount of pain your kid will receive in life you will be directly responsible. You had the chance to end it, you had the chance to prevent suffering. You know he is going to suffer and yet you only care about yourself. Adoption ? Really? Have you seen the kids that end up in adoption? I have and it's the complete opposite of nice and beautiful. This kid is gonna grow up wondering who their real father and mother is and why they have abondend him. He will blame himself and he might even be unable to live with it. Don't pretend like you act for the benefit of your kid. You're just another self-centered human. Money, that's all you fucking care about. 50 000? What? Is that what you want to get for willingly carrying a child 9 months in your uterus? You just want to make easy money. You're just another fake "human" in fake "society".

 

[Final Escape]

This world is Hell. Why would you bring a child into this shithole? There's no guarantee the child will be adopted. The kid could end up in foster care and then dumped into the cold, hard world at 18

I guess I have faith that the baby will be ok. The world is not all awful but yes there is plenty of evil and bad shit. We are brainwashed to believe that the world is all evil and there's no hope though. I never used to believe in God but I was woken up. I started gaining new info and it changed my view on a lot.

 

[Final Escape]

I suffered a lot too but I'm still glad I got a chance to be here even though it's been a challenge.

 

[Volatile]

I guess I have faith that the baby will be ok. The world is not all awful but yes there is plenty of evil and bad shit. We are brainwashed to believe that the world is all evil and there's no hope though. I never used to believe in God but I was woken up. I started gaining new info and it changed my view on a lot.

You found religion??

 

[Final Escape]

Do you mean us, the people here that have been suffering for their entire lives desperate for an escape?
We don't worship death, we don't worship anything. Period. We want to end our suffering and the only permanent way to do that is death. Suicide is a process that takes many years sometimes decades to complete. It is not an action. If you really think about us in this way I think it's best if you just leave this website and never come back again.

Go live your live with the values you perceive to be correct. But know this. For every amount of pain your kid will receive in life you will be directly responsible. You had the chance to end it, you had the chance to prevent suffering. You know he is going to suffer and yet you only care about yourself. Adoption ? Really? Have you seen the kids that end up in adoption? I have and it's the complete opposite of nice and beautiful. This kid is gonna grow up wondering who their real father and mother is and why they have abondend him. He will blame himself and he might even be unable to live with it. Don't pretend like you act for the benefit of your kid. You're just another self-centered human. Money, that's all you fucking care about. 50 000? What? Is that what you want to get for willingly carrying a child 9 months in your uterus? You just want to make easy money. You're just another fake "human" in fake "society".

Duh most people are self centered, and that's normal. We are always trying to get the best, lowest price, best quality, most economically beneficial situation. That's how we are wired but this is not a bad thing but it is when u bring the state into transactions between individuals. It alters incentives and that's when things become dangerous in society.

 

[Tiburcio]

?

 

[throwaway123]

Duh most people are self centered, and that's normal. We are always trying to get the best, lowest price, best quality, most economically beneficial situation. That's how we are wired but this is not a bad thing but it is when u bring the state into transactions between individuals. It alters incentives and that's when things become dangerous in society.

Wow, you just admitted to being a delusional ,religious self-centered piece of shit. Thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off.

I can't believe it. Just get out of here. Somebody ban her.

 

[hopeis5427]

!

Wow, you just admitted to being a delusional ,religious self-centered piece of shit. Thank you for your honesty. Now fuck off.

I can't believe it. Just get out of here. Somebody ban her.

i feel like some people are using the fact that this is a suicide forum and that suicide is viewed as 'taboo' so all sorts of toxic people who arent even suicidal with npd and sociopathy come here. Also the fact that this woman has had over 4 abortions really makes it questionable as to what kind of a person she is.It really is sad when human beings decide to engage in casual sex but dont try and wear protection or dont take birth control pills and then they get pregnant and abort. Unless she was "brutally raped" those 4 times and had to abort those babies 4 times,which i highly doubt.

 

[Mr2004]

Babies have never been more unsafe in the womb since the legalization and normalization of abortion. I just can't murder again unless the baby is messed up. It is murder ok. It is a human being, I realize we live in a culture that worships death now but I just can't do it.

The death worship that goes on on here irks me somewhat. You seem like a nice person and I 'll apologise on behalf of anyone saying otherwise. Just because we've fucked our lives up why should the whole world burn for our mistakes. It's immature as fuck and seems like a cult. Have the child, it sounds like you want to and some good could come from this situation