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Voidad

Voidad

The Fearful
May 4, 2023
43
Hello. The severe desire to kill myself appeared out of nowhere and I'm barely hanging on. I cannot die. I have to stay alive for my mother. I promised her.
I take some medications. The names are Paxera, Pinral, Tranko-buskas and Olfrex. Do you think any of these medications caused this and do you think I should stop taking them?
If anyone has any idea, please help me out. Thank you in advance.
 
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Reactions: Anon7075, whywere, Forever Sleep and 3 others
Languish

Languish

A Flower of Flesh and Blood
Feb 7, 2025
127
Don't commit suicide. This is an order. Disobey and I will be mad at you. Be good.
 
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InTheStars

InTheStars

Member
Feb 16, 2025
40
You have to see the doctor who prescribed you those medications soon as possible! Maybe there are some side effects making you feel that way. Please think of your mother every second! She would be devastated if you die. There is no one in the world she loves more than you!
 
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Voidad

Voidad

The Fearful
May 4, 2023
43
You have to see the doctor who prescribed you those medications soon as possible! Maybe there are some side effects making you feel that way. Please think of your mother every second! She would be devastated if you die. There is no one in the world she loves more than you!
My doctor did absolute jack-shit. She told me to keep taking my meds and go outside time to time for some fresh air.
I have an appointment with a different one, hopefully I can hang on until then...
 
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ma0

ma0

How did I get here?
Dec 20, 2024
593
One thing you'll find is that actually commiting is really hard, between SI and the potential guilt, it's hard for even me, as someone who actually wants to CTB.

Stick to your guns, refuse temptations, and hide anything that may aid you in CTB'ing.

Good luck.
 
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HappiestAngel

HappiestAngel

Member
Mar 11, 2023
37
It personally helped me a bit to think about death differently.
Your life is really really short when compared to the amount of time you haven't been alive. And life will comparatively last only a small amount of time. You will get what you want sooner or later and no one can take that away. Even if you stay alive for now, it'll end soon enough.
 
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NearlyIrrelevantCake

NearlyIrrelevantCake

The Cake Is A Lie
Aug 12, 2021
1,605
If this helps, here's a list of talk/text support lines that DO NOT call 911 if you admit to being suicidal.

 
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Skallagrim

Skallagrim

Member
Apr 14, 2022
41
You have a mother, you made a promise to her. Keep her in your thoughts.

At least one of those meds is SSRI based. The side effects of those when you start them can make you feel like absolute crap, physically, emotionally and mentally. Those symptoms go away. They don't suddenly stop, but will drift out as your brain chemistry stabilizes.

Hang on in there and weather this storm, it's going to pass.
 
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LunarEc

LunarEc

I luv Sharon Van Etten
Feb 13, 2025
116
Use whatever methods that you use to cope. I personally turn on the hot water in the shower and let it pour down my head, put some music on and let it distract you.
 
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r.vival

r.vival

Member
Mar 29, 2024
43
be more with your mom. i hope you can make more and more memories with her. just to stay alive. stay alive for her! sometimes a loved one really helps with so much cruelity in life.
 
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rottenandabused

rottenandabused

Member
Dec 3, 2024
23
CTB attempts and succesful CTB are mostly out of impulse, hence the "but you looked fine" question.

What I do to avoid doing it out of impulse is wait three weeks. Maybe it'll go away, if it doesn't, I'll reach out for help (adjust meds, find coping mechanisms, avoid being alone, anything to remind me life won't always be like this)
 
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Dot

Dot

Info abt typng styl on prfle.
Sep 26, 2021
3,237
Hello. The severe desire to kill myself appeared out of nowhere and I'm barely hanging on. I cannot die. I have to stay alive for my mother. I promised her.
I take some medications. The names are Paxera, Pinral, Tranko-buskas and Olfrex. Do you think any of these medications caused this and do you think I should stop taking them?
If anyone has any idea, please help me out. Thank you in advance.

Hve u talkd wth ur mothr - = wld b gd t/ hve sme1 keepng an ey on u & helpng t/ kp u sfe

If urges bcme 2 mch thn contct EMS

Perhps mke a crsis plan

Crisis Plan

Also thre = sme info abt copng wth ovrwhelm whch mght hlp


Fingrs crossd th/ 2nd doctr wll hlp u bettr -- b honst abt u r nt feelng sfe rght nw
 
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F

Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
11,508
I've known friends be very negatively affected by a change in medication so, I think it's possible it could be the drugs. Obviously though, you would need a doctor to advise on that. I hope you find someone more willing to listen. Did the change happen after a change in medication? I'm sorry you're going through this. I kind of think you need to keep pestering doctors until one takes you seriously.
 
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lastbusouttahere

lastbusouttahere

Torn between curiosity and despair
Feb 19, 2025
8
If it a new impulse with no obvious trigger events then meds do seem a probable cause. As others have said, pester your Doctor, they have a duty of care.
 
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W

whywere

Illuminated
Jun 26, 2020
3,250
I get such a very strong feeling about just how much and deeply that you love your mom. Think of the times that both of you can be and do things together and the ear-to-ear smile that you give her.

Ctb is one and done and it will not go anywhere and the time that you get to spend with your mom now is pure gold and the joy is immersible and hold her close to you always.

I never had real "parents" that cared anything about me, and you are gifted with a loving and caring mom, just so darn wonderful!

Walter
 
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Voidad

Voidad

The Fearful
May 4, 2023
43
Update: I was told to not take the SSRI medication anymore and I think I already feel much less suicidal. This was a close call. Thank you everyone for your wholesome replies.
 
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