pleroman
Arcanist
- Feb 22, 2024
- 464
Anyone here knowledgeable about how the entire administrative mortuary process from moment of death to literal grave works?
AI has been only barely helpful and gives conflicting info, but hopefully some fellow suicide squad-mates here have worked it all out already.
What I want to achieve:
-My death causes as little burden as possible for everyone.
-Absolutely no surprise financial costs or even decisions for any family left after my death.
-Ideally, my body would have already been processed and disposed of/ashes scattered or whatever before my family even hears about my death.
My research thus far:
Funeral Home Pre-Pay/Pre-Need
I think this can be done at personal cost, if I contact a funeral home and pay out the ass for all my final arrangements. BTW I want nothing fancy at all. Dirty toilet paper is flushed and forgotten, not kept in envelopes for a memento. They can help with pre-paying cremation, transportation, all that. I think it's called a pre-need. But from my point of view it shouldn't cost $$$ to die, whether the decedent or survivors pay.
Body donation
I suspect there may be a semi-solution already for many of us here: donating your body to science/medicine. There are quite a few organizations offering this, including Universities. They handle most stuff without cost I think, including even the cremation and optional return of your remains to your family. I am still looking into it carefully, because in today's world a body donation to science/medicine could mean putting your brain in a jar and torturing it with brain-computer interfaces and AI. No that is not a joke or fantasy, google the company "Bexorg" that revived brain tissues to test drugs on. Imagine it gets much worse than that. Even some Harvard staff was caught pants down selling brains to shady companies before cremating bodies, "Harvard morgue scandal." This risk will get much worse in the near future the way technology and culture is trending, so very careful selection of the organization and stipulations on use of your body are non-negotiable. Maybe get it in writing to forbid nitty-gritty vile tricks like cloning parts, keeping your genetic info, and god knows what else.
Yeah, it's doubtful those Bexorg brains were the same as the full consciousness of the deceased, but who knows, and for sure these experiments will only get nastier and bolder.
Also have mixed feelings on even simple organ donation. I don't mind helping people that could use parts of my body to live a good life themselves but at the same time don't really want some organ of mine "alive" still, particularly given the above scenarios. Each person must consider their comfort level here. For me, maybe a medical school practice autopsy and then into the fire/mass-grave is probably okay though.
Transportation Costs
My original CTB plans were a last hurrah travel, going out in style Leaving Las Vegas style in South America on a quest for pentobarbital/nembutal/euthasol. Drink the peace elixir and drift off in the best hotel I can afford in Peru type of thing. But dying overseas complicates things. I haven't researched this part a ton, but even for regular death, travel insurance may be the only way to get those costs down. It's a lot harder to predict the whole process, whether they repatriate etc. Even local cremation and shipping the ashes or just administrative fees from whatever country are possible I imagine.
Last year I do think I found there are some organizations that accept and cover cost of even international body donation, but who knows what might trip up the process. Also possible for body donation local, i.e. a local university in whatever country you are in if you are sure you will die there. You could reach out to them once in the country and quickly sign paperwork and so on, but it could raise some alarms or cause disputes or admin issues.
But also, if for example I die from jumping at a place like Grand Canyon, how to keep family from owing for example a helicopter retrieving your body/rescue efforts?
Final rest: cremation/burial/toilet flushing/scattering
Seems like cremation/burial is one of the tougher costs to avoid (aside from the donation route mentioned above). There's surely a mix of personal preferences here. But we've got to work out the many legal procedures and logistics in place that complicate everything, if you want to achieve this cheapskate death like me.
Now, I am lucky in that I am a veteran (USA), and they have this thing called pre-need eligibility you can apply for online quickly. This lets you be buried/scattered/simple plaque at any of a large offering of National Cemeteries and even more cemeteries funded by government grants. Since I sadly cannot express to my family my intent to take my own life (owing to cultural/legal attitudes about suicide), maybe being scattered nearby with my name on a wall would offer them some sort of comfort. It's free if you are a veteran. BUT it's just the ticket. AI (conflicting info) reports you'd still have to pay for cremation? There may also be some hassle getting your remains/ashes from a body donation to the National Cemetery. And you can't preplan anything; it just confirms you are eligible, so still a burden on family aside from best efforts like paperclipping my wishes to my body or something?
I think ultimately police/med examiner/cemeteries/everyone eventually requires Funeral Home involvement? Seems like a vile vulture industry, ready to assault your family with unnecessary costs upon death. Or just any money you have left. If you have $0 on death and no family, it's of course not as much a concern.
Other unexpected costs?
Are there any other hidden costs, arrangement issues etc I am missing here? Family getting charged $ for death certificates, medical examination, who knows?
And this isn't even getting into the hassle of whatever physical stuff I have left, making sure to have phone/bills set to cancel, all private data on phone/computer destroyed or well-organized, making sure money transfers to my family on death without some expensive will/attorney process...sigh.
I will (TRY) to simplify that by having already disposed most of my belongings and anything left in a tiny, compact neat box with paperwork on top of it, plus most $ in simple transfer-on-death accounts.
Thank for you reading and for any advice.
Been a very miserable, slow few years now getting ready to die. Severe depression and physical tension makes it hard to sit still and get it all worked out, but I know that having it all set will make it easier and bring some sort of sick comfort. Perhaps it's another form of survival instinct that my brain is sabotaging itself with MORE depression, often to the point I cannot even doomscroll but just pace or flop around in misery, to stifle my own plans. But this life cannot even let us die without going through hell first.
Sure ideally once you are dead all this worry is erased (I hope), but I don't want to dump any more grief on my family or anyone.
If it were as simple as just sitting in a dumpster and blowing my brains out there, and the world was careless enough to just shrug it off and dump it like the rest of the trash and the whole thing be done with, I'd do it. If you can advise me on even the precise physical location to die for convenience (outside a medical examiner office?), even that would be helpful!
AI has been only barely helpful and gives conflicting info, but hopefully some fellow suicide squad-mates here have worked it all out already.
What I want to achieve:
-My death causes as little burden as possible for everyone.
-Absolutely no surprise financial costs or even decisions for any family left after my death.
-Ideally, my body would have already been processed and disposed of/ashes scattered or whatever before my family even hears about my death.
My research thus far:
Funeral Home Pre-Pay/Pre-Need
I think this can be done at personal cost, if I contact a funeral home and pay out the ass for all my final arrangements. BTW I want nothing fancy at all. Dirty toilet paper is flushed and forgotten, not kept in envelopes for a memento. They can help with pre-paying cremation, transportation, all that. I think it's called a pre-need. But from my point of view it shouldn't cost $$$ to die, whether the decedent or survivors pay.
Body donation
I suspect there may be a semi-solution already for many of us here: donating your body to science/medicine. There are quite a few organizations offering this, including Universities. They handle most stuff without cost I think, including even the cremation and optional return of your remains to your family. I am still looking into it carefully, because in today's world a body donation to science/medicine could mean putting your brain in a jar and torturing it with brain-computer interfaces and AI. No that is not a joke or fantasy, google the company "Bexorg" that revived brain tissues to test drugs on. Imagine it gets much worse than that. Even some Harvard staff was caught pants down selling brains to shady companies before cremating bodies, "Harvard morgue scandal." This risk will get much worse in the near future the way technology and culture is trending, so very careful selection of the organization and stipulations on use of your body are non-negotiable. Maybe get it in writing to forbid nitty-gritty vile tricks like cloning parts, keeping your genetic info, and god knows what else.
Yeah, it's doubtful those Bexorg brains were the same as the full consciousness of the deceased, but who knows, and for sure these experiments will only get nastier and bolder.
Also have mixed feelings on even simple organ donation. I don't mind helping people that could use parts of my body to live a good life themselves but at the same time don't really want some organ of mine "alive" still, particularly given the above scenarios. Each person must consider their comfort level here. For me, maybe a medical school practice autopsy and then into the fire/mass-grave is probably okay though.
Transportation Costs
My original CTB plans were a last hurrah travel, going out in style Leaving Las Vegas style in South America on a quest for pentobarbital/nembutal/euthasol. Drink the peace elixir and drift off in the best hotel I can afford in Peru type of thing. But dying overseas complicates things. I haven't researched this part a ton, but even for regular death, travel insurance may be the only way to get those costs down. It's a lot harder to predict the whole process, whether they repatriate etc. Even local cremation and shipping the ashes or just administrative fees from whatever country are possible I imagine.
Last year I do think I found there are some organizations that accept and cover cost of even international body donation, but who knows what might trip up the process. Also possible for body donation local, i.e. a local university in whatever country you are in if you are sure you will die there. You could reach out to them once in the country and quickly sign paperwork and so on, but it could raise some alarms or cause disputes or admin issues.
But also, if for example I die from jumping at a place like Grand Canyon, how to keep family from owing for example a helicopter retrieving your body/rescue efforts?
Final rest: cremation/burial/toilet flushing/scattering
Seems like cremation/burial is one of the tougher costs to avoid (aside from the donation route mentioned above). There's surely a mix of personal preferences here. But we've got to work out the many legal procedures and logistics in place that complicate everything, if you want to achieve this cheapskate death like me.
Now, I am lucky in that I am a veteran (USA), and they have this thing called pre-need eligibility you can apply for online quickly. This lets you be buried/scattered/simple plaque at any of a large offering of National Cemeteries and even more cemeteries funded by government grants. Since I sadly cannot express to my family my intent to take my own life (owing to cultural/legal attitudes about suicide), maybe being scattered nearby with my name on a wall would offer them some sort of comfort. It's free if you are a veteran. BUT it's just the ticket. AI (conflicting info) reports you'd still have to pay for cremation? There may also be some hassle getting your remains/ashes from a body donation to the National Cemetery. And you can't preplan anything; it just confirms you are eligible, so still a burden on family aside from best efforts like paperclipping my wishes to my body or something?
I think ultimately police/med examiner/cemeteries/everyone eventually requires Funeral Home involvement? Seems like a vile vulture industry, ready to assault your family with unnecessary costs upon death. Or just any money you have left. If you have $0 on death and no family, it's of course not as much a concern.
Other unexpected costs?
Are there any other hidden costs, arrangement issues etc I am missing here? Family getting charged $ for death certificates, medical examination, who knows?
And this isn't even getting into the hassle of whatever physical stuff I have left, making sure to have phone/bills set to cancel, all private data on phone/computer destroyed or well-organized, making sure money transfers to my family on death without some expensive will/attorney process...sigh.
I will (TRY) to simplify that by having already disposed most of my belongings and anything left in a tiny, compact neat box with paperwork on top of it, plus most $ in simple transfer-on-death accounts.
Thank for you reading and for any advice.
Been a very miserable, slow few years now getting ready to die. Severe depression and physical tension makes it hard to sit still and get it all worked out, but I know that having it all set will make it easier and bring some sort of sick comfort. Perhaps it's another form of survival instinct that my brain is sabotaging itself with MORE depression, often to the point I cannot even doomscroll but just pace or flop around in misery, to stifle my own plans. But this life cannot even let us die without going through hell first.
Sure ideally once you are dead all this worry is erased (I hope), but I don't want to dump any more grief on my family or anyone.
If it were as simple as just sitting in a dumpster and blowing my brains out there, and the world was careless enough to just shrug it off and dump it like the rest of the trash and the whole thing be done with, I'd do it. If you can advise me on even the precise physical location to die for convenience (outside a medical examiner office?), even that would be helpful!
