Venting Past memories coming back........ again. Same for you?....

[Lone_Gray_Wolf]

Hi there, uh I gotta say that this is my first thread; so keep that in mind.

I was just listening to music and suddenly I wanted to listen to a song I had saved from 2 years ago, one that I used to listen when depressed and suicidal. I got over the depression at least twice but fell back again. Listening to those songs revive the pain from back then; before I recovered for the first time. Seeing that I have been dragging this crap for 2 years its discouraging and those songs bring back those feelings like it was yesterday; frustration, crying myself to sleep, not wanting to live for another day, way too much pain that I don't know how did I went through that and still alive. It hurts to be in the same spot from years ago.... This shouldn't be like this....

I´m sure I can´t be the only one who get demolished by something like this or memories. I would like to think that... What is your situation regarding similar feelings/situations?. Is the past something you still dragging or that still hurts?.

 

[OnlyTheWind]

Sorry to hear that the past is such a burden for you. I have had the same experience with music/ memories. There are some songs that I am scared to listen to because of what they will make me feel. Fourteen years and nothing's changed.

 

[BasedGod]

Yeah getting back to where im from and the bad memories have flooded back. Cant wait to leave. Living out of your car has one bonus in that you can leave anytime

 

[rt1989526]

I can't stop having dreams with people from my past.

 

[Worthless_nobody]

Yes I relate so much! So sorry your going thru it too, it's so hard. Songs, smells, noises, seeing certain things in life it all triggers me and brings me back to a terrible mental state because it brings back all the pain, suffering and trauma. There are certain songs I cannot listen to because they remind me of my abusive ex and it's like this nauseating weight feeling inside me. I can't even drive past his town because it's so triggering.

 

[SipSop]

I feel like I vented here way too much...
But it hurts do much to hear songs at radio. Everything is about love and sex with few exceptions... it reminds me of when I was happy with her.
Now those songs are torture as I k ow she is with somebody else, she checks on somebodye else in the mornings or when she feels alone.
I wish you didn't had to experience what I had.
I wish I was complete.

 

[cyberlordsumit]

more like nightmares for me. it's bad as it is.. all my memories are tainted.. there's no solace.