Hello everyone,
I'm considering to CTB with full hanging. Because I don't think it's legal to have SN in my country. On top of that there are so many things that could go wrong with partial as well as full. But I think I have a chance with full hanging. Is there any tips that you guys could give me such as knot type and what not. I highly appreciate it. Or some other sure way to CTB please help me I'm desperate I just can't do this anymore I tried so hard to make up my mind and go on and life my life but I don't think I can. Please don't try to talk me me out of it.
Hi STRIKER19966,
Ok, I won't try to talk you out of it but I will mention a few things you may want to try first because I don't want anyone to ctb before i do, lol.
This is what I tell myself, Jesus life is so short anyway and life flicks by like a blink of the eye, it's a permanent solution to a temporary problem, well not in my case I had an episode and was described risperidon, only 2mg I was told it was a very low dose it worked, after 6 months I started to wake up every night after 4 hours sleep my eyes would just open, I started to feel strange in work, I stop talking to people I started to have suicidal thoughts and depression due to the side effects they forgot to mention, plus all the other side effects, I stopped taking them after a year, I am a year clean of all meds, the side effects have not gone away. I had an excellent job, lots of money, worked for years in an office clean shaved in a suit every day, plenty of around the World travel, now I get out of bed and sit down on the settee and watch TV and surf the internet and go to bed at 4am, I don't even want to wash now, lol sorry got carried away with my own story, haha.
I have considered various ctb options we all have, some are great some are quick some are not so quick, I have tried partial hanging it didn't work I have the place where I can do full hanging I have the rope and knot prepared already just a small loop with many knots and feed the rope through to create the noose, I have considered jumping of beachy head in the UK, I have considered gas but they have cottoned on to that idea as they are mixing it, so you don't get the final results wanted, I considered disposable bbq's in a tent in a field, jumping in front of a train or tube but I never had the bottle. I am in no rush to exit I am trying different options speaking to my doctor, I have told my family and friends I need help I am going to top myself they still don't believe me, lol. I said if I do, don't think of blaming yourselves it's my bloody life and decision. I have surfed the net for my symptoms and to see if anyone else is suffering similar symptoms and if they have been successful with any particular drug.
I don''t want to leave behind any guilt so I have a long note explaining everything.
Sorry for ranting I needed to get it of my chest, see I help you and you have helped me.
Plus, as you will see i'm a new member but I had gathered all this information for my departure from other resources and decided to join this site to speak to like minded people in a similar position..
What I'm saying you don't have to rush into anything take your time do a bucket list first explore different options and make the right choice, your choice as an adult.
Cheers Geo
