tpurced
Just passing through this world
- Oct 23, 2020
- 20
I used to be confident in myself, and in my abilities but that is long gone. My mind questions everything I do. I've even tried to stay away from SS, even though it feels like my safe haven, just because I'm scared. Even writing this post I'm unsure if I should post it- my mind constantly reminds me of how it all could fail. It feels like I've rewritten all of this a thousand times.
I'm always anxious about how certain decisions I make and have made will impact myself to the extent that I'm distancing myself from others just so I don't have to think about it. I'm staying away from events, friends and social life most of the time.
It drains me of all my energy.
The times I do meet friends are plagued by my mind thinking that they really never liked me. I wanted to write that I know that it isn't the case- but truthfully I don't know. It's at the point when nothing really feels real.
I can't go on like this for much more much. I dunno anymore.
I'm always anxious about how certain decisions I make and have made will impact myself to the extent that I'm distancing myself from others just so I don't have to think about it. I'm staying away from events, friends and social life most of the time.
It drains me of all my energy.
The times I do meet friends are plagued by my mind thinking that they really never liked me. I wanted to write that I know that it isn't the case- but truthfully I don't know. It's at the point when nothing really feels real.
I can't go on like this for much more much. I dunno anymore.
