Help no time

[Mr. Squiggles]

I wanted to write a book, fill it with drawings and then leave with its release.

Sometimes it feels like recovery.
But eventually i want to be the one to put out the lights. and it seems i always fall back

So, i wonder, would you finish that book?

Because after all my whole world will be annihilated and everything voided, anyway.
time will stop, and theres no point in eternity.

once i'm dead the timing wont matter anymore. so whats the difference

 

[Dr.Sleep (Im tired)]

Holy Shit, you illustrated that? You must be gifted.

Regardless, I think what you are trying to achieve is closure after death: something to leave people that were hurt by your passing. The truth is that everything you do holds gravity; every action, photo, memory, even existing holds gravity. I guess my point is If you wanted to leave something for someone, maybe spend time with your loved ones, give them something good to remember.

Again, it also may not hurt to just talk through what you're feeling with someone trusted.
*** (edit) Just sent you a pm, would you be so kind and check it out?

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

Holy Shit, you illustrated that? You must be gifted.

Regardless, I think what you are trying to achieve is closure after death: something to leave people that were hurt by your passing. The truth is that everything you do holds gravity; every action, photo, memory, even existing holds gravity. I guess my point is If you wanted to leave something for someone, maybe spend time with your loved ones, give them something good to remember.

Again, it also may not hurt to just talk through what you're feeling with someone trusted.

i did. thank you, sometimes it was enough to come by.
no marble or canvas can survive man but i just recently learned what you just told me and it feels satisfying to practice.

but that love will turn into pain rippling through all layers of reality until the last memory fades.
idk if i make sense, i cant eat or sleep rn and my mind is burning, my meds stopped working.
i think im just wondering why wait any longer

 

[level_playing_field]

I wanted to write a book, fill it with drawings and then leave with its release.

Sometimes it feels like recovery.
But eventually i want to be the one to put out the lights. and it seems i always fall back

So, i wonder, would you finish that book?

Because after all my whole world will be annihilated and everything voided, anyway.
time will stop, and theres no point in eternity.

once i'm dead the timing wont matter anymore. so whats the difference
View attachment 105940

This is absolutely beautiful and so well done. You have a real gift. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

This is absolutely beautiful and so well done. You have a real gift. Thank you for sharing.

thank you

 

[HerculePoirot]

Talented people should NOT be allowed to commit suicide.

 

[Electronic Music]

Wow!

Truthfully that word sums up what I wanted to say, please keep us posted with more drawings and illustrations. Legend.

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

Wow!

Truthfully that word sums up what I wanted to say, please keep us posted with more drawings and illustrations. Legend.

thank you, very kind. i will try to do so

 

[outrider567]

I wanted to write a book, fill it with drawings and then leave with its release.

Sometimes it feels like recovery.
But eventually i want to be the one to put out the lights. and it seems i always fall back

So, i wonder, would you finish that book?

Because after all my whole world will be annihilated and everything voided, anyway.
time will stop, and theres no point in eternity.

once i'm dead the timing wont matter anymore. so whats the difference
View attachment 105940

well done

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

hello.
this is page one to four

 

[trist]

hello.
this is page one to four

words cannot describe how much i admire this

 

[FuneralCry]

That art really is so amazing and detailed, thank you for sharing.

 

[WorthlessCoward]

I have a journal/diary/log/chronicle that only I understand (or so I would like to believe) that I started a long time a go but I didn't do it for others, just because I wanted to. I would really like to be buried with it but knowing my country graverobbers probably gonna take it.

Anyways, worst come to worst, it's like an exposition skeleton in a videogame. Useless filler (most of the time, 100% in case this time though).

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

thank you. it means a lot to me

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

5 and 6? im drunk

 

[ptolemaea]

i think death allows us to be more honest, as we know we won't be here to face the consequences. it's a similar line of thinking with diaries and journals. anyways, you are a very talented artist. i'm glad we got to see your work

 

[YourAverageLurker]

Your art is stunning, thank you for bestowing it upon this community. Words cannot express how you must feel, but just know I would buy that book.

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

am not sure if i am allowed to do this, but, if you feel like it, you can check out my stuff here now: https://suicide.church

 

[spacehardware]

I wanted to write a book, fill it with drawings and then leave with its release.

How very Sylvia Plath of you

Jokes aside, I wanted to do this myself. But that was before I tumbled into a pit of crippling self-doubt, then further into the abyss of nihilism. I was scared what I would leave behind would be criticised. Then even more so that it would be celebrated, that people that never even knew me would remember me for my writing. Then I thought, why spend time perfecting something that will no longer matter once I'm gone.
Your illustrations are beautiful. And your hand-written words, all capitalised, are gut wrenchingly powerful. Thank you for sharing.

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

How very Sylvia Plath of you

Jokes aside, I wanted to do this myself. But that was before I tumbled into a pit of crippling self-doubt, then further into the abyss of nihilism. I was scared what I would leave behind would be criticised. Then even more so that it would be celebrated, that people that never even knew me would remember me for my writing. Then I thought, why spend time perfecting something that will no longer matter once I'm gone.
Your illustrations are beautiful. And your hand-written words, all capitalised, are gut wrenchingly powerful. Thank you for sharing.

thank you very much. i hope you are still writing, from time to time

 

[Myforevercharlie]

Bloody f.....that's just beautiful
You really should let that be seen by someone who works into publishing..if you would want that.

Wow...

 

[RichardFirst]

That is some beautiful artwork.

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

Bloody f.....that's just beautiful
You really should let that be seen by someone who works into publishing..if you would want that.

Wow...

thank you. but i want to get it right first. i tend to abandon stuff halfway through

 

[mypersonalhell]

Very nice artwork, post more if you have them.

What does it say on the cover?

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

Very nice artwork, post more if you have them.

What does it say on the cover?

thank you, i'm working on it. the title is 'aschera'. demonum transfiguratio. my latin sucks doe.
if you mean the hebrew its an oath in 3 parts as a tryptichon. it says: our temple lies hidden within your eye; not a reflection of calm waters but deep sea currents forever frozen in time. /our sun is shrouded in envy of your radiance; not of this world but the next./our swords are sheathed; not to surrender your grace, but to strike down the stars aligned.
it was translated by a friend that wont talk to me anymore; i'm learning slowly but for now i can only write the alphabet

 

[iamnotokaywiththis]

I wanted to write a book, fill it with drawings and then leave with its release.

Sometimes it feels like recovery.
But eventually i want to be the one to put out the lights. and it seems i always fall back

So, i wonder, would you finish that book?

Because after all my whole world will be annihilated and everything voided, anyway.
time will stop, and theres no point in eternity.

once i'm dead the timing wont matter anymore. so whats the difference
View attachment 105940

this illustration is absolutely crazy good!! i think that even though we will all die one day, there are still people who would love to see this book, and people who will take joy from it while they are still alive. so share your gift!!!

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

this illustration is absolutely crazy good!! i think that even though we will all die one day, there are still people who would love to see this book, and people who will take joy from it while they are still alive. so share your gift!!!

thank you. it means a lot to me

 

[Storyteller]

This looks absolutely gorgeous. I wished to do something like this, but unfortunately have no skills to draw and now just too tired to start.

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

This looks absolutely gorgeous. I wished to do something like this, but unfortunately have no skills to draw and now just too tired to start.

i really want people to draw. when in 2013 i lost a painting that i worked 150hrs on, i wouldnt allow myself to paint for five years, because i knew it wouldnt be as good as that which is gone already.
don't let those demons rob you of the little joys. they might even be helpful at some point. time is far too valuable and we can only create so much.
i hope you find the energy for what you need

 

[Mr. Squiggles]

aschera verse II: our sun is shrouded in envy of your radiance; not of this world, but the next