Venting No longer wanting to be happy

[anima000]

Anybody else here just realize that you no longer wish to be happy? Kind of an odd thing that came to me recently. Just wanted to see what y'all thought.

 

[Salvation_]

Yeah, but it was more like realizing that I didn't want to be saved anymore. Seems like it's along the same vein.

 

[locked*n*loaded]

I'm not sure I wouldn't like to be, more so than I realized that I'm not going to be, no matter what I do at this point and all points moving forward. Known that for some time it just can't be. Impossible to do enough to reach that point as not possible in this world the way things are.

 

[CommitSudoku]

I'm not sure what I want anymore or what I wish for. I start to dream then I'm reminded I'll be incapable of achieving it because of how I am, or I'll be reminded of the past and then it hurts and there's nowhere to go with those feelings. Death is the only consistent "wish" I've had. I'm not sure if I want to be saved or not, since nothing would change in the end. It gets to a point where nothing I want can be reached for me and in some ways I'd rather this misery drown me so it finally ends.

 

[needforvoid_]

I no longer can be happy, wishing something I can't have only hurts me.

 

[its-about-time]

I consider myself an emotional masochist because I seem to enjoy chasing feeling miserable, but don't have much interest in pursuing happiness. When it's bad, I always want to see how much worse it can get. I think it sucks for those who love me more than it does for me.

 

[solisoccasus]

Anybody else here just realize that you no longer wish to be happy? Kind of an odd thing that came to me recently. Just wanted to see what y'all thought.

Yeah same here. I no longer hope for happiness it became impossible for me to achieve it. I only have disappointments if i hope for happiness.

 

[FuneralCry]

Happiness does not even exist to me, I do not know what it would even be like to be happy. I do not even really want to feel anything positive, because I know that it would never last and would just cause more suffering. Nothing good ever seems to last in this life, I think that existence is disappointing and depressing overall. To me it makes sense to be miserable, as my life is just meaningless suffering. The only thing that I want is to be gone from this world.

 

[Symbiote]

Being happy for me meant more suffering and turmoil later on. I associate happiness with emotional pain so therefore I rather not feel happy or sad. Just keep me in the middle.

 

[Fadeawaaaay]

Happiness is no longer possible unfortunately

 

[WorthlessTrash]

I am 30ish years too late to be happy. I was basically doomed from the start.