I have been off of this forum for a long long time now but it's as if things have only gotten worse. Getting better isn't just ' feel a little better about yourself '. It's making a lot of actions in order to take things from where you are ( this site ) to what you strive for. I was aware of that but for a while i just stopped thinking right, just did whatever i could read on my screen written by other people, taken completely out of context.
I think i messed up by trying to go through the conventional method of getting better. Just forget your sorrows or cope hard. I think if i do that for too long i would become worse of an animal that i am right now. I literally am one right now due to trying to get away from my past, as in run away from it. Not only that, my basic abilities have been hindered a lot by me being isolated for so long, over a year now. My screen makes things worse.
I am a student though, i mean i should be but i am not enrolled anywhere and i am not studying. It's time to get into a college.
I have put myself in a cage long enough to have developed ( probably ) social anxiety. A lot of it actually.
With the way things are, i can't just walk out into the society like the animal i feel like right now. I know the major problem is that of my priorities and that i lack confidence ( probably ). I feel so little of myself because i took a gap year and i have lost any usual teenage skills that teenagers usually have. I feel scared to face people. I feel scared to face my reality. I want to feel better but not just by coping this time.
I'd really appreciate all the responses here, even if i can't reply, i would smile a lot for every interaction i would make here.
Thank you for reading this.
You're not burdened to necessarily write something, it's alright if you don't have something to say.
Night.
I think i messed up by trying to go through the conventional method of getting better. Just forget your sorrows or cope hard. I think if i do that for too long i would become worse of an animal that i am right now. I literally am one right now due to trying to get away from my past, as in run away from it. Not only that, my basic abilities have been hindered a lot by me being isolated for so long, over a year now. My screen makes things worse.
I am a student though, i mean i should be but i am not enrolled anywhere and i am not studying. It's time to get into a college.
I have put myself in a cage long enough to have developed ( probably ) social anxiety. A lot of it actually.
With the way things are, i can't just walk out into the society like the animal i feel like right now. I know the major problem is that of my priorities and that i lack confidence ( probably ). I feel so little of myself because i took a gap year and i have lost any usual teenage skills that teenagers usually have. I feel scared to face people. I feel scared to face my reality. I want to feel better but not just by coping this time.
I'd really appreciate all the responses here, even if i can't reply, i would smile a lot for every interaction i would make here.
Thank you for reading this.
You're not burdened to necessarily write something, it's alright if you don't have something to say.
Night.
