Venting My PTSD Story

[LivingHellonearth]

I never thought that my life would end this way, I was a happy guy until 2 years ago, July 19 of 2020 is the date that changed my life forever. I move to the US when I was 17 years old in 2013 I did 2 years of high school and took 2 years off then I decided to start college I switch my morning job to a night job at a restaurant (the worst decision of my life) I started going to school during the mornings and work during the nights everything was going good until July 19 of 2020 when I played a joke on a coworker he is a big and strong guy I mock him by saying " I'm so strong and mad" I was joking, but he didn't like it. as i try to walk out he push me to the wall, he dislocate my right shoulder and brake two of my ribs, I got a tendon injury and my scapula got injured aswell its been almost 2 years and im still in pain,I never reported the incident because I was blaming myself all the time. I Was diagnosed with PTSD Depression and anxiety. Everyday is hell for me I'm constantly reminding me of how stupid I was for not reporting the incident I can't do anything I'm always in pain I just want to kill myself for being so stupid. I wish I never went to work there, I wish I was stronger to protect myself I wish I did something about it now it's too late I ruin my life forever I can't enjoy anything I just want to died. I can't believe how did my life changed for a single joke, This is the reason why I will CTB in a couple of months I just can't take it anymore.

 

[Crazy4u]

This is terrible. I am sorry you are in physical and emotional pain. I don't think you can feel happy without getting rid of your physical pain. Doctors can be so incompetent. Why are you still in physical pain?

 

[LivingHellonearth]

This is terrible. I am sorry you are in physical and emotional pain. I don't think you can feel happy without getting rid of your physical pain. Doctors can be so incompetent. Why are you still in physical pain?

I have done 3 MRIs on my shoulder And the doctor says it's fine maybe it's a nerve that it's damage I don't know what to do anymore.

 

[FuneralCry]

That sounds really horrible what you are going through. I'm sorry you are suffering so much. I can imagine that it must be so unbearable to be in so much pain. I wish you the best in whatever happens.