Almost all my life I've been affected by depression. It started when I was around 6 and when I was 8 I started to try and "drown" myself in pools. (I had no idea what I was doing, obviously)
When I was 11/12 was my first real attempt. I was scared to do anything like ODing or hanging but I read online that drinking too much water would kill you due to all your cells being so waterlogged they couldn't function. I planned a date and drank 24 bottles of water. I puked so much and it didn't work.
Another attempt was slitting my wrist. This was fairly recent and not related to the weak attempts of my childhood. Me and a friend had been planning this for months, dying and going to an alternate reality where we're happy. Personally, I believe that the afterlife is shaped by what you believe it to be, but that's irrelevant. I went to her house and we took about 30-40 ibuprofens each, waited an hour, then got into her bathtub with warm water (to pump blood faster). We cut up our legs, ankles, shoulders, etc to get as much blood out of us as possible. Then we started to cut each others wrists as well as cutting our own ourselves. We were aiming for the radial artery but couldn't cut deep enough. Eventually we got out, swallowed whatever pills were in her closet, and went to bed.
I'm not sure if I would call this last one an attempt but it happened last night. Me and the friend texted each other, set up nooses, and tried partial suspension hanging. My vision was going black, I couldn't breathe, and my hearing started to diminish within seconds. It didn't hurt at all. We decided instead to wait until Saturday (3 days from now) when we are both free to die together. So, I guess I hope to be dead then
When I was 11/12 was my first real attempt. I was scared to do anything like ODing or hanging but I read online that drinking too much water would kill you due to all your cells being so waterlogged they couldn't function. I planned a date and drank 24 bottles of water. I puked so much and it didn't work.
Another attempt was slitting my wrist. This was fairly recent and not related to the weak attempts of my childhood. Me and a friend had been planning this for months, dying and going to an alternate reality where we're happy. Personally, I believe that the afterlife is shaped by what you believe it to be, but that's irrelevant. I went to her house and we took about 30-40 ibuprofens each, waited an hour, then got into her bathtub with warm water (to pump blood faster). We cut up our legs, ankles, shoulders, etc to get as much blood out of us as possible. Then we started to cut each others wrists as well as cutting our own ourselves. We were aiming for the radial artery but couldn't cut deep enough. Eventually we got out, swallowed whatever pills were in her closet, and went to bed.
I'm not sure if I would call this last one an attempt but it happened last night. Me and the friend texted each other, set up nooses, and tried partial suspension hanging. My vision was going black, I couldn't breathe, and my hearing started to diminish within seconds. It didn't hurt at all. We decided instead to wait until Saturday (3 days from now) when we are both free to die together. So, I guess I hope to be dead then
