My body is a walking corpse

[Lou_Charthethird]

i truly just cant understand that i exist anymore. Like there is something in my brain stopping me from thinking and feeling and acting like me. Like everything is fundamentally meaningless-not in a depressing way- but in a factual way. I cant feel bad or sad or depressed or suicidal at all actually. I force myself to try to kill myself because i physically cannot have urges anymore. It swings both ways, positive emotions and thoughts and negative ones. I feel my inner person has died and is never coming back. Things have happened, very good and very bad, that i have had no reaction to. Ive gotten so used to acting without impulses, and just acting as if i still have them. This is a ramble and pointless. I understand that most wont relate or even care enough to read this. I wish someone could just kill me swiftly and save me this pointless existence. All my passion has died, along with my fears and urges and likes and dislikes- all gone. I am dead. My body is a husk- a walking corpse.

 

[Hollowman]

I can relate. I've been dead inside for years.

 

[blush]

this sounds soul tearing. the feeling of deep, endless, numbness. i hope healing comes ur way