Venting maybe tonight will be the good one

[aeri]

maybe tonight after my saxophone rehearsal and my therapy session it will be the end. i'll tell her i dont wanna continue to see her. i'll do it quickly so i can go home. and then maybe. then please. then silly me. just ctb. please. i cant anymore. im so exhausted. I'm drained. i tried. but i cant

 

[Tiemblo]

I can not stand myself anymore. I want to die today. Everything is ready but my SI is strong.
I really can't!
But soon I will kick my SI and I will Rest In Peace forever.

 

[FuneralCry]

I understand the feeling of being so tired of everything and I know that it is hard to carry on when you suffer so much. I'm sorry that it has come to this point for you, it is such an unfair life. I hope that in whatever happens, you find relief from what you are going through.

 

[aeri]

nvm im getting drunk and cutting

 

[Nemeshisu]

It's not shameful to back out oot of suicide attempt. I hope that someday you will find peace in one way of another. You'rs such an kind person so you deserve it.

 

[aeri]

It's not shameful to back out oot of suicide attempt. I hope that someday you will find peace in one way of another. You'rs such an kind person so you deserve it.

even if i deserved it, i dont have it. so there's no point. though thank you you're always so sweet to me. i can feel jur support from here

imo it's getting shameful. i tried to ctb when i was 15. im almost 21.still alive. what a fucking failure. what a pity. im disgusting

 

[alliebear]

Hey.. dont feel shameful. Ctb isnt as easy as we think it is. If it is easy, all of us done it already. :) take your time honey, one step at a time. you deserve some rest rn. Know that we all here for you. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to chat me/ other great persons here. They're great listener. Wish you love xxx

 

[aeri]

Hey.. dont feel shameful. Ctb isnt as easy as we think it is. If it is easy, all of us done it already. :) take your time honey, one step at a time. you deserve some rest rn. Know that we all here for you. If you need someone to talk to, feel free to chat me/ other great persons here. They're great listener. Wish you love xxx

it's not easy but living is worse i just wish i did it. i should have died when i was younger. it woule have been tragic. now it's just pathetic. i'll die because im not an adult enough. cant suffer like everyone else. my pain is normal. i stupid for not being able to bear it. i need some eternal rest

thanks for your kind words it means a lot. even if i cant accept em please know it really means a lot and im happy to read em

 

[alliebear]

Youre most welcome dear. Its okay, I understand what you meant by that^.^ youre still young tbh, you are not stupid, and i agree that living is worse. Its tiring to wakeup day by day. But for now, take a breath and try to calm down. No shame, either way you're still brave for holding on here still. We all do. If one day you choose to giveup , you're still the brave one. :) xx

 

[aeri]

im so sad. i am so sad. i swear i tried. went to the emergencies went to the hospital talked to so many ppl tried therapy why am i always in sm pain? hahaha. and despite all that, i never kill myself. im pathetic. i am the one accepting to suffer. i could die. but no i dont do it. it's my fault if i suffer this much. it's all my fault

 

[Worndown]

I would suggest not telling anyone you do not want to see them anymore. That could alert them and make your life worse in case you do not go through with it. If you do ctb...they will figure it out.

 

[aeri]

I would suggest not telling anyone you do not want to see them anymore. That could alert them and make your life worse in case you do not go through with it. If you do ctb...they will figure it out.

tbh i dont have anyone anymore around me. moreover i've already deleted all my social medias so my trusted ppl surely know im going through something bad again. they're used to it so it's ok. i've never hid how suicidal i was so it wont alert them. it will be like it always is. but maybe this time i'll finally die. i hope. i dont want this cycle to go on

 

[princessdepression]

nvm im getting drunk and cutting

lol me rn