Venting losing my last connection

[deletedaccount30982]

my boyfriend and i are on the rocks right now. every conversation feels forced and when we do text a few times a day it feels dry. he doesn't agree with my decision to drop out and i'm having a hard time keeping up with his perfectionism in everything that he does. i don't have any friends beside him and the few that i do have are also his friends and would probably give up on me if we broke up. i don't want to do this anymore. i'm so alone. i hate myself

 

[FuneralCry]

I can imagine that it must be hard to be in that situation. I know that loneliness can be painful for many people. I'm sorry you are suffering. I wish you the best.

 

[whereismymind]

my boyfriend and i are on the rocks right now. every conversation feels forced and when we do text a few times a day it feels dry. he doesn't agree with my decision to drop out and i'm having a hard time keeping up with his perfectionism in everything that he does. i don't have any friends beside him and the few that i do have are also his friends and would probably give up on me if we broke up. i don't want to do this anymore. i'm so alone. i hate myself

I'm in the same situation

 

[rationaltake]

This really is hard to bear. I know it hurts.

 

[deletedaccount30982]

i just want to feel that spark between us. i want to feel like i love someone and someone loves me but it just isn't there anymore. maybe we need another break, but it's so painful

 

[CommitSudoku]

Does he know why you want to drop out and if he does has he been understanding of what you're going through even if he doesn't want you to drop out? I feel like if he knows and acts that way a break might be needed since it kind of feels like he's just adding to your burden and you're hurt more from it. It's your decision and you should do what is in your best interest. Continuing because of pressure from anyone else won't end well in one way or another. You might feel resentment or hate where you ended up with no hope to change things. If you haven't told him how you feel and everything then I think that's worth a try since perhaps he doesn't understand what's really going on and is ignorant. Maybe you just need time to really talk things out and get on the same page. I'd really say just reevaluate everything. I've always been very alone and wanted someone but I've realized some people shouldn't be in my life just to fill an empty space. It's wrong to treat them as such for both of us. Plus I just can't commit to long-term, personally, so I'd somewhat rather be alone than have others myself.