• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
Haematemesis

Haematemesis

Student
Jan 12, 2025
190
(i wrote this in my native language when i was having an anger attack and then i thought it would be cool to share it, so it's AI translation but the original is mine)

hatred, i'm not even sure if it's the right word because there's no expression to explain my feelings.
it's a complex and painful, chest-burning emotional stew.
the accumulated hatred that causes killers to stab the lifeless bodies of their victims repeatedly, even though they know they're already dead.
pure hatred echoing in my mind as i know i can never be happy in this single life, with every neuron firing and fueling it.

the intoxicating hatred that will never leave me until the final moments of my existence, slowly eroding my mind with every passing second.
this hatred, a black monster, that makes me disgusted by all the good things, a product of my individual conflicts with the past and future.
this hatred, a devil that punches the walls of my skull with every event that reminds me no one, not even myself, cares.
this hatred that drives me mad because i know i will never have what normal people acquire effortlessly.

i want to do all the disgusting things; i want to be remembered for ages by defying every religious, philosophical, and cultural norm, and to be cursed by generations to come.
i hope that god exists so he can reward me with eternal hellfire.
i want this disgusting creature to be punished as it deserves.
maybe i just want to be loved.
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: BlueButterfly111

Similar threads

auti
Replies
0
Views
132
Suicide Discussion
auti
auti
S
Replies
8
Views
538
Suicide Discussion
U. A.
U. A.
absolute failure
Replies
21
Views
627
Suicide Discussion
Lost in a Dream
L
moldyara2002
Replies
3
Views
292
Suicide Discussion
TheCavernousDeep.
TheCavernousDeep.
watashiwastar
Replies
1
Views
141
Suicide Discussion
thelostautistic
T