I've been getting better off and on, but so often I just want to give up.

[SleepyBB]

I'm close to changing my life, I can feel it. However every so often I get so overwhelmed and just want to break out the kit and CTB. Leave everything behind. Maybe the things I'm haunted by won't haunt me anymore and I won't have to worry about anything. I feel like even if I change everything, get better, make more money, find a partner, I'll still be met with my past somehow, somewhere. I feel like even if I succeed, I'll be hit with reality and I'll have to go dark for the rest of my life, or ctb to avoid the worst case scenario of living in the shadow of my mistakes. What helps you, SaSu?

 

[lamy's sacred sleep]

taking a break from everything
while trying to
find a greater reason to keep moving forward