I've always been an idiot

[SadGirl]

I've been dating for almost four years. In short, she helps me a lot financially, with college, medication, and even drugs. Anyway, because I have ADHD, I can't find a stable job. Right now, I'm selling chocolates on the street, and yes, she bought 50 of them for me to resell, but I'm a bit addicted to cocaine. She knows I use with a friend, but she doesn't know I'm using frequently, and this is causing financial harm. Besides, I owe her about 12,000. I always say I'll change, but I can't control my impulses. She would never understand, even though she has disorders too. She doesn't have a steady job, so that makes it more difficult. I ate some of the chocolates she bought for me to sell, and I don't have the income to pay for them. I'm an idiot. She says she's getting tired of it, and I understand. I just don't want her to break up with me. What do I do? (Regarding cocaine, I think I can handle it on my own without rehab).

 

[fedup1982]

Priority 1 should be getting off cocaine. If you can do it by yourself quickly, great. But just in case, I'd go to drug counselling sessions even if you don't go to rehab so you'll have some tools to stay clean. Especially since you have ADHD, you're going to have life long impulses to use drugs so you're going to need all the help you can get, NGL

 

[bankai]

Isn't cocaine like one of the most expensive drugs? You definitely need to stop that.

If you are having trouble being employed at somewhere else because of ADHD. Then the stuff like selling chocolates is definitely a good idea. Since you're essentially doing it on your own. That way there won't be any conflict or any micromanagement by anyone else.

Regarding the relationship, you're going to have to change abruptly. Sorry if this seems harsh, but yeah, there will be a point of no return. So before that comes, you're going to have to maybe apologise and change, but hold true to your word.

 

[concession]

How do you make people care about you? You must be pretty damn good

This story sounds insane

 

[prettysurethistime]

I'm not gonna lie, I'm not in a totally dissimilar situation to you but also kind of totally different.

Point is, I'm not judging you. But you obviously know the cocaine is a money drain and being dishonest with your girlfriend, particularly if she's financially unstable and supporting your drug habit unaware, is not a good thing. At least you recognise that. I'm not sure what you can practically do other than quit cocaine but try and be imaginative. What funding can you get for education? What skills or experience do you already have, if any (I'm in the not much boat so not a judgement)? Is there anything else you can do besides street selling?

I'm not sure where you live, you don't give a currency so it could be 12,000 Zimbabwean dollars and not much of a debt at all! But anyway, where you live is important in terms of employment opportunities, I appreciate that. However, I can't see what you're doing being very lucrative and finding more reliable employment would help your stability. Harder said than done, yes, but for your own sake as well as your partner's it's bluntly worth trying.


I hope everything works out for you! I'm having to do things that are hard for me too ATM so please understand I only mean to encourage.