It's time for me to go

[somniummalum]

Since my SN will arrive tomorrow (tracking suddenly jumped to my country), I've started the 48h regime by Stan with some Meto at 16:00.

Now I'm just cleaning my appartment, packing all my clothes, gave most of it to Humana (charity), writing some delayed e-mails, in which I will link a farewell letter. I'm not sure if I even have to say anything to these people anymore, maybe they don't even care. I don't know.

I've packed all my meds etc. for SN and booking a nice hotel room now. Have Xanax for sedation. Feeling really hungover, nervous, but also determined and kind of reliefed that I can finally have an out. It feels so calming to know that I don't have to go on longer. I feel at piece really, more than ever before.

Guys, even though I was not here for a long time, you've been awsome. This community is supportive asf. I felt understood here. Thank you for everything. I will probably be here when I'm leaving, will tell you how I feel while doing SN.
If everything goes right, I will take it tomorrow night.

 

[Ulisses]

it's good that you feel good. I feel very good to be able to start a journey whenever I want. Hugs and your journey is smooth.

 

[virginiawoolf86]

I hope that you find the peace you're looking for. Know that you are cared for even though you only spent a short time here.

 

[Zappfe lover]

Truly a shame that this world wasn't kind to you.

May you find peace

 

[KleinerWolf]

You can PM me if u have any glimpse of doubts.

Good luck and bon vayage otherwise.

 

[I screwed up]

We r with u in whatever u decide to do Buddy.... Sad u have to go .. Hope I get the courage soon

 

[EmbraceOfTheVoid]

Don't rush yourself if it's not your time to go. Good luck with whatever you decide on.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

Remember there's no pressure to do it if you feel uncertain. With that said, good luck and I hope it's all peaceful for you.

 

[TAW122]

I hope you are able to find peace in your remaining time and hope you have a smooth transition to the unknown when the time comes.

 

[Hopeindeath!]

I wish you peace.

 

[Sinai Silence]

Best of luck in your travels, you've been awesome too! I hope you find the peace you're looking for

 

[somniummalum]

SN didn't arrive, fuck me man.

 

[Ulisses]

SN didn't arrive, fuck me man.

calm friend, despair only brings anguish. occupy a mind with other things you like

 

[somniummalum]

calm friend, despair only brings anguish. occupy a mind with other things you like

Thank you... I will

 

[MeriDeath]

Any update? U still with us?

 

[somniummalum]

Any update? U still with us?

I'm still here. My SN is not here yet. I would've been gone for sure if it arrived that day, had already started the 48h regime.
I don't know what I will do when it arrives finally.