Help I'm feeling bad again cause of no touch issues

[Adûnâi]

Not too sure which good parts could be.

1. Robo waifus 2032 - still sound ridiculous, have to wait 8 years.

2. My mom is gonna give me ten thousand EUR in 2 years or so - but not sure how it can be relevant for sex, sure escorts, but can't buy a gf.

3. Could potentially emigrate to SEA - but it sounds like a pipe-dream, I still haven't tried their Tinder to determine if my face would even count as attractive, they have insects and heat. and anyway it's only after the Ukrainian war ends.

4. My mom has suggested rent-a-friend for calls, like 6 EUR for an hour of talking to a local human female or therapist over the phone - I guess, although I could also try Omegle / OMTV / Chatroulette for talking for free, too, and either way not sure how relevant.

My life - I'm under an indefinite house arrest in the Ukraine, never talked to any humans irl aside from my mom, but now I'm 28 so it's close to 30 so it's close to being tired.

Why not just kill myself and try again? It's so pointless. Yes, I'm whining, but I have nobody to talk to anyway, even online.

 

[bankai]

Escorts are so empty. They are just business women, dude.Having sex with them is so pointless.


It's not even worth it. Just put your money into savings.Shoot your shot with normal women or just be alone.

 

[Adûnâi]

Escorts are so empty. They are just business women, dude.Having sex with them is so pointless.

First of all, humans are just business humans overall. And second, of course I'd try to pick actual professionals that would try to weave an illusion of putting their soul into it. Also, there's a tradition of thought which rejects calling dominatrices sex workers... Ideally, I'd like a domme who also kisses, talks and does GFE.

Shoot your shot with normal women or just be alone.

The issue with me is that I've never talked to anyone in my life, so "shooting my shot" is empty talk to me, I have no idea what it means in reality. Not the slightest clue.

 

[waitin2go]

either way not sure how relevant.

^ this, is for below. I'd say go for it (Omegle etc)

I've never talked to anyone in my life,

I can't give any relatable feedback though, because I don't have the same problem (I'm not dying to be intimate with another human being; and also I have no difficulty getting out of the house or talking to grocery shop owners etc)

But I think you're already at a great start by consideration of those chatrooms as a stepping stone.

 

[Adûnâi]

But I think you're already at a great start by consideration of those chatrooms as a stepping stone.

Thanks! But my mom says psychologists could help with getting a gf, whereas I don't see anything relevant about it online?

 

[waitin2go]

don't see anything relevant about it online

My guess is because it's too niche of a subject, and (again, a guess) there's laws or ethics or code that psychologists have to adhere to on giving specific advice online.

my mom says psychologists could help with getting a gf

Probably via first actually talking to regular non-gf humans first (because that's the only way you're going to be able to figure out what you think of irl humans Vs the gf of your fantasies. Sucks, but you need to be able to talk to humans before you can get a gf. Life doesn't have "get a gf cheat codes")

 

[Crematoryy]

Not too sure which good parts could be.

1. Robo waifus 2032 - still sound ridiculous, have to wait 8 years.

2. My mom is gonna give me ten thousand EUR in 2 years or so - but not sure how it can be relevant for sex, sure escorts, but can't buy a gf.

3. Could potentially emigrate to SEA - but it sounds like a pipe-dream, I still haven't tried their Tinder to determine if my face would even count as attractive, they have insects and heat. and anyway it's only after the Ukrainian war ends.

4. My mom has suggested rent-a-friend for calls, like 6 EUR for an hour of talking to a local human female or therapist over the phone - I guess, although I could also try Omegle / OMTV / Chatroulette for talking for free, too, and either way not sure how relevant.

My life - I'm under an indefinite house arrest in the Ukraine, never talked to any humans irl aside from my mom, but now I'm 28 so it's close to 30 so it's close to being tired.

Why not just kill myself and try again? It's so pointless. Yes, I'm whining, but I have nobody to talk to anyway, even online.

Adunai, I really like your intelligence. I remember you from years ago. We are both going through the same problems.

 

[derekWest]

Not too sure which good parts could be.

1. Robo waifus 2032 - still sound ridiculous, have to wait 8 years.

2. My mom is gonna give me ten thousand EUR in 2 years or so - but not sure how it can be relevant for sex, sure escorts, but can't buy a gf.

3. Could potentially emigrate to SEA - but it sounds like a pipe-dream, I still haven't tried their Tinder to determine if my face would even count as attractive, they have insects and heat. and anyway it's only after the Ukrainian war ends.

4. My mom has suggested rent-a-friend for calls, like 6 EUR for an hour of talking to a local human female or therapist over the phone - I guess, although I could also try Omegle / OMTV / Chatroulette for talking for free, too, and either way not sure how relevant.

My life - I'm under an indefinite house arrest in the Ukraine, never talked to any humans irl aside from my mom, but now I'm 28 so it's close to 30 so it's close to being tired.

Why not just kill myself and try again? It's so pointless. Yes, I'm whining, but I have nobody to talk to anyway, even online.

Or you can turn gay like me ! So easy to find an hookcup when you are gay ! Much more easy than when you are hetero guy.

 

[Adûnâi]

Adunai, I really like your intelligence. I remember you from years ago. We are both going through the same problems.

Oh huge! Thanks! Have we talked otherwise? What have you tried though? I feel like a fake incel because I tried absolutely nothing when I could, and now I cannot.

Or you can turn gay like me ! So easy to find an hookcup when you are gay ! Much more easy than when you are hetero guy.

Careful, "becoming gay" is actually an anti-LGBT stance, from what little I understand neo-Christian theology in America haha. There are certain avenues where I could consider guys - for example, if they're fully in drag, on HRT, and the penis isn't showing... But it's very hypothetical and ridiculous.

To anyone reading this message not from this forum - NO, I'm 0% gay, I'm just intellectual, hence why I'm thinking ridiculous thoughts such as
"a guy would be fine if he looks like a girl and the penis is not detectable". But how would it not be detectable? Do I mean fully clothed? And with perfumes? And with a carefully-curated height? Does that mean an HRT midget? See, it makes no sense, and no, I'm not gay.

Hell, I never even watched futanari pornography, hell, I never even watched pornography with uncaged dicks because dicks confuse me, that's how un-gay I am : (

 

[derekWest]

Careful, "becoming gay" is actually an anti-LGBT stance, from what little I understand neo-Christian theology in America haha.

Ah sorry ! I'm off course not anti -lgbt. But more clearly, maybe I have just discover that I'm bi (I like women and men).
But, as I'm very dumb to find a woman, maybe, I have will just seek for men... That's why, I will be visible as gay....

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Hey, recovering sex addict here. Let me just tell you this. I'm plain AF, and I'm very skinny. With women, getting a girlfriend is EASY - and yes, I expect a bunch of incels to Disagree BUT here me out. Stop placing this VALUE on an experience that is common for most people on the daily/weekly/etc or it will always have control over you. It's just sex/a relationship/a person/etc, but as long as you're chasing your "missing puzzle piece" you're going to keep the mindset that you're broken... And perhaps even worse than that is you're going to expect another human being to fill a hole inside of you that no one else can.

I would recommend getting a female therapist who you KNOW you're NEVER going to sleep with and just practice having conversations with her, nothing weird. Just formal conversations. And when you're comfortable with eye contact and socializing, start talking to women online AS FRIENDS...

Eventually you'll be able to have a girlfriend without any issues. But you got to be secure in yourself, be able to at least fake being happy with yourself etc.
You have absolutely no idea HOW many women in America romanticize foreign men. But you need to have experience on WHEN to take something to a personal level and when not to. So maybe asexual communities are best for you until you're confident and stable enough to deal with the rejection, heartache, drama and Bs that comes with dating.

Respectfully, it is a numbers game. And you could be with someone 3 months, 6 months, a year, or in my case it was 12 years and poof... They're done.
And frankly, the most secure thing you can do is walk away with a smile on your face, because nothing will bring back whatever you had with that person. So, respectfully... Love yourself. And find someone who respects you and is loyal to you, because that matters a lot more than love ever will, and iykyk.

 

[Adûnâi]

Just formal conversations. And when you're comfortable with eye contact and socializing, start talking to women online AS FRIENDS...

Every time I've tried it, they've ghosted me. It doesn't work. I've been trying to be "nice" with this girl who is literally mentally stunted and asexual for 14 months, who was calling me "handsome" every time, who was modifying my picture in paint.exe... And she said, "you sound so happy today, this makes me feel like you won't be angry when I say I don't want sex" - that's after me asking her if she was forced to have sex every single month of our online conversation, and with her being literally _offended_ I was suggesting she didn't want to have sex with me!

Again, being nice simply doesn't work. Not that I would be rude with anyone, I'm clueless as fuck, lmao. And likely ugly to boot. And I cannot do anything irl as I'm under an effective house arrest due to being a penis-haver in the Ukraine.

Eventually you'll be able to have a girlfriend without any issues. But you got to be secure in yourself

This is literally a bluepill though? If you're having no issues having sex as an AMAB, you're a chad, simple as. My really kind and hyper-intelligent dead Nazi friend was a chad, too. Their experience simply doesn't apply to a virgin loser almost 30 who never even talked to any humans IRL aside from teachers.

_I simply don't know how or when to open my mouth._

And find someone who respects you and is loyal to you, because that matters a lot more than love ever will, and iykyk.

I have unironically thought about being a cuck as being superior to being a virgin incel. No, I do NOT have a cuck fetish, even though femdom is WAY too often adjacent to cuckoldry. I hate men in sexual circumstances. But I was honestly asking myself if I would reject a scenario where I were paying for a girl to have sex with me, and she would also fuck other guys. Would I agree or reject such an arrangement? No idea. It's like, would I cut off my pinkie finger if it turned me into a chad? Scholastic questions...

 

[ghost5555]

Ultimately it's a paid service and it's nonsexual, but if you have a source of income you could probably pay for some massage therapy sessions to satisfy your desire for physical touch

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Every time I've tried it, they've ghosted me. It doesn't work. I've been trying to be "nice" with this girl who is literally mentally stunted and asexual for 14 months, who was calling me "handsome" every time, who was modifying my picture in paint.exe... And she said, "you sound so happy today, this makes me feel like you won't be angry when I say I don't want sex" - that's after me asking her if she was forced to have sex every single month of our online conversation, and with her being literally _offended_ I was suggesting she didn't want to have sex with me!

Again, being nice simply doesn't work. Not that I would be rude with anyone, I'm clueless as fuck, lmao. And likely ugly to boot. And I cannot do anything irl as I'm under an effective house arrest due to being a penis-haver in the Ukraine.


This is literally a bluepill though? If you're having no issues having sex as an AMAB, you're a chad, simple as. My really kind and hyper-intelligent dead Nazi friend was a chad, too. Their experience simply doesn't apply to a virgin loser almost 30 who never even talked to any humans IRL aside from teachers.

_I simply don't know how or when to open my mouth._


I have unironically thought about being a cuck as being superior to being a virgin incel. No, I do NOT have a cuck fetish, even though femdom is WAY too often adjacent to cuckoldry. I hate men in sexual circumstances. But I was honestly asking myself if I would reject a scenario where I were paying for a girl to have sex with me, and she would also fuck other guys. Would I agree or reject such an arrangement? No idea. It's like, would I cut off my pinkie finger if it turned me into a chad? Scholastic questions...

Like I said about if someone leaves... As toxic as it might sound... Bro that just means next in line. It sucks and there's times that you'll really be heartbroken... But worrying about the end at the beginning is only making a imaginary wall in front of you. You're at the start, so you got to walk this path and stop making excuses because you're capable much more than you realize. Gary Coleman (American actor) was 2 ft tall and broke and still had a wife... Google him. You are counting yourself out of a race and you're talking yourself out of the realization that you're further along than you realize.

So you've talked to women, but you wanted a person who was asexual to be sexual? They were someone you got to communicate with, but they will never grow into what you want them to grow into. So, the best thing you could have done was to break up with her and then date someone who wants sex.

And I never said be nice to them. Respectfully being nice comes off as creepy to women and I would very much like if some women would flat out say that. Being normal is what you need to be to them. Don't be holding doors open for total strangers and kissing the ground or anything. Don't be complimenting them every 2 seconds...
Just make conversation. If she talks to you long enough one of two things will happen... You'll ask her out and she'll say yes, or you'll ask her out and she'll say she's got a bf or someone she likes/etc... So let's say she says now. "Okay, np." And then depending on how you handle it...
A couple weeks later her and her bf are broken up,
She's going to try to hint that she wants you to ask her out again. Personally I wouldn't, but you're free to do what you like. But the more people you talk to the higher chances you are finding someone.

As for the whole blue pill thing nahhhh.
If this was a more socially acceptable site I would send pictures and show you that literally if I can do it you can do it... But unfortunately, this isn't the place to share photos. I'm not a Chad.
I'm like 160 and 33 years old. And Broooo you can do a movie date and stream something.

Ultimately it's a paid service and it's nonsexual, but if you have a source of income you could probably pay for some massage therapy sessions to satisfy your desire for physical touch

Respectfully, it's him wanting a "normal" sex life and having mood drops from being touched starved. It's understandable, but realistically, anyone can find a partner. We're tricked by society into thinking that as a man you have to be perfect.
Realistically you just have to not value women as objects, but the problem is people take that concept... And then completely avoid women expecting them to just fall into their laps from the sky.

You will never find a woman if you don't look.
You will never know if she's just being nice if you don't ask.
And frankly even if you pass away at the rifled age of 100 without never knowing the touch of a woman... You cannot sit here and lie to yourself and tell me there weren't at least five opportunities each day if you just said something like "hey is it cool if I message you?" That's my problem with this incel culture...
If a woman doesn't want you
SHE'S not the woman you want.

But people always chase things they can never have and then wonder why they're so unhappy.
Smh.

 

[Adûnâi]

Like I said about if someone leaves... As toxic as it might sound... Bro that just means next in line. It sucks and there's times that you'll really be heartbroken... But worrying about the end at the beginning is only making a imaginary wall in front of you.

Just to clarify, all of those cases were online, and online doesn't even count. I'm a corpse offline. All I ever did was go to class - get grades - leave home. I know nothing else. Would a psychologist help me? My mom thinks so, but nobody ever talks about psychologists - even you here.

All in all, I simply have no idea how, where and when to talk. My Korean friend has suggested churches. In fall 2023, before my house arrest, I was really close to entertaining starting the procedure of joining either the Jehovah's Witnesses or the Hare Krishna cult - but then I got put into house arrest by virtue of reaching 27. But not sure about their age and sex structure.

So you've talked to women, but you wanted a person who was asexual to be sexual?

This girl is 35+ and a mildly famous internet personality. No, she did not understand what asexuality was, she was mentally stunted, she didn't even understand what "severe autism" meant, she was completely clueless. And even she rejected me.

And I never said be nice to them. Respectfully being nice comes off as creepy to women and I would very much like if some women would flat out say that. Being normal is what you need to be to them.

But I'm not "normal" LMAO. I'm not "normal" with anyone at all! I'm nice to everyone, and also have my personal quirks, like wtf lmao

Just make conversation. If she talks to you long enough one of two things will happen... You'll ask her out and she'll say yes, or you'll ask her out and she'll say she's got a bf or someone she likes/etc... So let's say she says now. "Okay, np." And then depending on how you handle it...
A couple weeks later her and her bf are broken up,

I have never talked to anyone irl in my entire life, I'm 28. Is that too hard to understand? No friends, no communication, not even an inkling of an idea how/where/when they do what.

If this was a more socially acceptable site I would send pictures and show you that literally if I can do it you can do it... But unfortunately, this isn't the place to share photos. I'm not a Chad.
I'm like 160 and 33 years old. And Broooo you can do a movie date and stream something.

To clarify, by chad, I do not subscribe to the incel blackpill point (as I simply don't have enough information to make a judgement as to the veracity of the theory). I don't care. It might be the personality. But guess what, I cannot change my personality. I cannot randomly become a gangster, or a rich person, or a femboy, if all my life I've been a shut-in incel virgin wearing official trousers and shirt. That's just not how it works. Maybe I could be trained like a dog, but I'd need a teacher. At the very least, I don't have any information.

Realistically you just have to not value women as objects, but the problem is people take that concept... And then completely avoid women expecting them to just fall into their laps from the sky.

I'm sorry, I have NOT treated women as ANYTHING at all in my life, as I have never TALKED to ANYONE in my life, why do you default to some normie thing which is irrelevant to our conversation?

And frankly even if you pass away at the rifled age of 100 without never knowing the touch of a woman... You cannot sit here and lie to yourself and tell me there weren't at least five opportunities each day if you just said something like "hey is it cool if I message you?" That's my problem with this incel culture...

Do I randomly approach people and ask them to be my gf? Incidentally, this is what the severely autistic past future gf of mine did - she asked a hundred men irl literally that question, and everyone rejected her. I guess, they were scared she was gonna sell their organs or something? We're in Eastern Europe so that might be a possibility.

I did not reject her, I literally clinged to her for 14 months, and yet she effectively rejected me. Still not sure if her words mean anything one way or another. I feel like she's the only one mentally stunted enough to go to the Ukraine to meet a random weirdo in his room.

But people always chase things they can never have and then wonder why they're so unhappy.

I would agree to any woman that doesn't literally have HIV. I have zero standards.

 

[TheLastGreySky]

Just to clarify, all of those cases were online, and online doesn't even count. I'm a corpse offline. All I ever did was go to class - get grades - leave home. I know nothing else. Would a psychologist help me? My mom thinks so, but nobody ever talks about psychologists - even you here.

All in all, I simply have no idea how, where and when to talk. My Korean friend has suggested churches. In fall 2023, before my house arrest, I was really close to entertaining starting the procedure of joining either the Jehovah's Witnesses or the Hare Krishna cult - but then I got put into house arrest by virtue of reaching 27. But not sure about their age and sex structure.


This girl is 35+ and a mildly famous internet personality. No, she did not understand what asexuality was, she was mentally stunted, she didn't even understand what "severe autism" meant, she was completely clueless. And even she rejected me.


But I'm not "normal" LMAO. I'm not "normal" with anyone at all! I'm nice to everyone, and also have my personal quirks, like wtf lmao


I have never talked to anyone irl in my entire life, I'm 28. Is that too hard to understand? No friends, no communication, not even an inkling of an idea how/where/when they do what.


To clarify, by chad, I do not subscribe to the incel blackpill point (as I simply don't have enough information to make a judgement as to the veracity of the theory). I don't care. It might be the personality. But guess what, I cannot change my personality. I cannot randomly become a gangster, or a rich person, or a femboy, if all my life I've been a shut-in incel virgin wearing official trousers and shirt. That's just not how it works. Maybe I could be trained like a dog, but I'd need a teacher. At the very least, I don't have any information.


I'm sorry, I have NOT treated women as ANYTHING at all in my life, as I have never TALKED to ANYONE in my life, why do you default to some normie thing which is irrelevant to our conversation?


Do I randomly approach people and ask them to be my gf? Incidentally, this is what the severely autistic past future gf of mine did - she asked a hundred men irl literally that question, and everyone rejected her. I guess, they were scared she was gonna sell their organs or something? We're in Eastern Europe so that might be a possibility.

I did not reject her, I literally clinged to her for 14 months, and yet she effectively rejected me. Still not sure if her words mean anything one way or another. I feel like she's the only one mentally stunted enough to go to the Ukraine to meet a random weirdo in his room.


I would agree to any woman that doesn't literally have HIV. I have zero standards.

So everything you said comes down to the very last thing you mentioned. You are choosing to have zero standards because you have zero experience.

Fake.It.

And respectfully you're going for what appear to be women who are older than you because you think they have lower standards... Personally this is not my experience but I'm going to tread carefully here so I don't get a bunch of women in their 30s and older feeling that this is meant as some sort of attack. You can message me, it's 4:00 a.m. my time so I will be getting off within 30 minutes or an hour but I will definitely message fairly often as long as you respond I will pretty much match you whenever I can.

You have to be willing to accept that women and men have different brains, and again this isn't meant to Target anyone or their ideology...
But realize that your approach is not working not because of your looks. It's because you're approach doesn't work.

I have gotten more dates rinsing and repeating what works then trying to find a sincere connection with someone. People cannot help what they are attracted to and I think philosophically you have this moral objection to being the type of person that will attract women.
It's called game for a reason though.
If you're playing soccer on a basketball field you're going to lose everytime.

You should be thinking about what worked when talking to the woman you said was a mild internet celebrity. Because if you fed her vanity, maybe you can incorporate that into your approach.

((And just to be clear to everyone reading I'm not saying whatsoever to objectify people, but in approaching someone and getting them to open up the op is able to actually get to know the person. As much as you think responding to messages with "hey" convey anything to us they really don't.))

I'm just going to tell you, dating sucks.
It doesn't matter how many times you get lucky it's a boring game in which everyone lies to varying degrees until you really get to know them, and then your face with the awful choice of toss them or settle. It's really stupid and it's very very disappointing. But that's the reality. It's like a video game in the sense that you're going to lose but if you quit playing cuz you suck you're never going to get better.

 

[Adûnâi]

And respectfully you're going for what appear to be women who are older than you because you think they have lower standards...

This is a clear case of how much misunderstanding is between us (mods, please don't lock this thread, we're actually making progress here and talking constructively).

I'm not "going for" anyone. I have no idea how even to begin to "go for" anyone. This girl messaged me on Reddit randomly, that's it.

And how can you blame me for having low standards? The main charge against incels is that they supposedly have too high standards! So me having lower standards is a boon, not a sin. I'm lost why you'd consider otherwise.

But realize that your approach is not working not because of your looks. It's because you're approach doesn't work.

Again, I have never mentioned looks at all in this thread - only that I have no idea about them. And I have no idea about any approach at all either. I need to learn an approach to try it out (IF the war ever ends, I guess. Or maybe on Reddit).

You're referring to how people have ghosted me, but that also applies to males, I never pursued any female aside from this severely autistic 35+ girl.

Case in point - I cannot follow Discord general chats either. I simply get lost in the swarm of messages and people.

I have gotten more dates rinsing and repeating what works then trying to find a sincere connection with someone. People cannot help what they are attracted to and I think philosophically you have this moral objection to being the type of person that will attract women.

Umm, no? I literally don't care about any of that? Ideally I'd make my mom pay a girl 500 EUR per month or more to hold my hand.

You should be thinking about what worked when talking to the woman you said was a mild internet celebrity. Because if you fed her vanity, maybe you can incorporate that into your approach.

She's too autistic to understand internet fame. She didn't realise having pigs shit in her rented apartment was gonna make her roommates hate her, that's how clueless she was. I'm not exaggerating, that happened.

(Alright, I shouldn't bully you for this, but it's still funny how you're thinking my life makes any sense - you thought the person I was talking to was reasonable. But it's the same as thinking I had any friends growing up. Or even opened my mouth. No, I only ever opened my mouth if I had left an eraser at home. Yes, I'm 28, but talking about high school which ended 12 years ago because I have been even more isolated since.)

It doesn't matter how many times you get lucky it's a boring game in which everyone lies to varying degrees

I have no idea how even to begin to start lying, that's how clueless I am. You're talking about stage 8 when I'm at stage -2.

P.S. Of course, I'm incredibly grateful for this exchange, don't get me wrong! But I think I have marked plenty of points where you're assuming normie things about me, and I'm anything but. This is the extent of the cultural chasm between us. It feels like you're thinking I'm you, just with a lower self-esteem. But no, I simply do not have the skills or info (which also might be biological in nature, like how if a child doesn't learn to talk, it never will).

 

[TheLastGreySky]

This is a clear case of how much misunderstanding is between us (mods, please don't lock this thread, we're actually making progress here and talking constructively).

I'm not "going for" anyone. I have no idea how even to begin to "go for" anyone. This girl messaged me on Reddit randomly, that's it.

And how can you blame me for having low standards? The main charge against incels is that they supposedly have too high standards! So me having lower standards is a boon, not a sin. I'm lost why you'd consider otherwise.


Again, I have never mentioned looks at all in this thread - only that I have no idea about them. And I have no idea about any approach at all either. I need to learn an approach to try it out (IF the war ever ends, I guess. Or maybe on Reddit).

You're referring to how people have ghosted me, but that also applies to males, I never pursued any female aside from this severely autistic 35+ girl.

Case in point - I cannot follow Discord general chats either. I simply get lost in the swarm of messages and people.


Umm, no? I literally don't care about any of that? Ideally I'd make my mom pay a girl 500 EUR per month or more to hold my hand.


She's too autistic to understand internet fame. She didn't realise having pigs shit in her rented apartment was gonna make her roommates hate her, that's how clueless she was. I'm not exaggerating, that happened.

(Alright, I shouldn't bully you for this, but it's still funny how you're thinking my life makes any sense - you thought the person I was talking to was reasonable. But it's the same as thinking I had any friends growing up. Or even opened my mouth. No, I only ever opened my mouth if I had left an eraser at home. Yes, I'm 28, but talking about high school which ended 12 years ago because I have been even more isolated since.)


I have no idea how even to begin to start lying, that's how clueless I am. You're talking about stage 8 when I'm at stage -2.

P.S. Of course, I'm incredibly grateful for this exchange, don't get me wrong! But I think I have marked plenty of points where you're assuming normie things about me, and I'm anything but. This is the extent of the cultural chasm between us. It feels like you're thinking I'm you, just with a lower self-esteem. But no, I simply do not have the skills or info (which also might be biological in nature, like how if a child doesn't learn to talk, it never will).

Here's step 1. Stop making excuses and start learning through trial and error. Or are you going to sit here and tell me you can't Google "how to ask a girl out" "how to talk to women" "dating as an autistic adult" etc?

Im telling you that you're the one saying you can't do something. I believe you sincerely can because you've shown your intelligence with your writing.
But having your mom pay $500 a month for someone to hold Your hand? You're better than that. I believe you're capable of believing in yourself.

I can't make you believe in yourself.
But I'm rooting for you.

Who cares if you're labeled and incel with too high or too low standards? No matter what anyone calls your win it's still a win IF you are growing as a person and doing your best to consider the feelings of other people involved.

I won't try to convince you that you have everything you will ever need inside you. But honestly, we're on the same planet, close in age and I'm also autistic. So why can't someone who presumably isn't autistic do what I do?

No one is better than you to take control of your own life. Isn't that why you're here?

 

[Adûnâi]

Here's step 1. Stop making excuses and start learning through trial and error. Or are you going to sit here and tell me you can't Google "how to ask a girl out" "how to talk to women" "dating as an autistic adult" etc?

I don't know what to try though? I did ask on Reddit in Jan 2024, and I also asked 2 of my chad friends (the recently deceased, and a much older one), and all I got was "approach women in the library" or "the park". Which doesn't tell me much.

The idea I got in late 2023 was join a cult such as Hare Krishna or JWs, but I didn't get around to it. Would it be relevant? Is that what you'd have in mind?

But having your mom pay $500 a month for someone to hold Your hand? You're better than that. I believe you're capable of believing in yourself.

I literally have no information though? You haven't told me what to do either.

I won't try to convince you that you have everything you will ever need inside you. But honestly, we're on the same planet, close in age and I'm also autistic. So why can't someone who presumably isn't autistic do what I do?

Again, can you tell me what you did specifically? Without names, obviously, but at least the general area?

I've also been given advice to do magic rituals to Lord Zepar from the Lesser Key, I'm open to literally any suggestions, I'm not too proud even to piss myself in public (I never did, but I could try if it were relevant).

 

[Adûnâi]

My mom is saying my granny is gonna sell her house and give me 10k EUR, would that be enough to get a gf? I'm thinking of suicide actually. Really awkward that my mom is gonna leave for a month, I'd have to do it either before or after June...

 

[waitin2go]

Ideally I'd make my mom pay a girl 500 EUR per month or more to hold my hand.

Not sure what's the rates there, but BRUH that's 2x a month therapy sessions (if you choose a junior/trainee to start the ball rolling, that could be 4x a month too)

then again, you're too hyper focused on getting a gf; probably need to overcome that first

 

[Adûnâi]

Not sure what's the rates there, but BRUH that's 2x a month therapy sessions (if you choose a junior/trainee to start the ball rolling, that could be 4x a month too)

Well 250 EUR/hr, and I'd have to be careful to select a professional. My requirement of both a domme and GFE is already complicated because the two usually aren't offered together. But either of the two has pitfalls - GFE could be way too vanilla (let alone dating - I'm not into dating, I'm into talks BUT not eating together), and domme services could just be geared towards jaded experienced folks.

Huge asterisk btw - escorts and gfs have as little in common as online and irl. I CAN and should be picky when it comes to escorts because 500 EUR - but I will NOT be picky when it comes to gf - again, I spent 14 months talking to an unmedicated severely mentally ill old woman (she's thin though, I have not been seduced by non-thin entities, that I must admit...).

then again, you're too hyper focused on getting a gf; probably need to overcome that first

Yes, if you want to eat, you should stop thinking about food. That makes total sense lmao.

By the way, I shouldn't be too scathing, but I have just gotten a fresh idea (and totally mine) - people who are successful at sex cannot imagine my situation to such an extent that they literally make narcissistic strawmen about me instead of listening. That's what even my hyper-intelligent and super-kind chad Nazi friend behaved like at times - he once said, "I don't believe there's not a single Ukrainian girl who'd fuck you". Yes, imagine that.

Of course, I have no idea. I do know that I'm not bald, not fat, not homeless, and not a dwarf. But I have zero status - no social circle (past or future), no Dubai pics, no car, and no knowledge.

Literally the only thing I could use would be money, when my mom gives me, and my granny sells the proverbial garage - _maybe_ you could find a girl desperate for money, so she would be a semi-psudo-escort, but probably not, as status/looks would be too lagging behind, and money is simply not valued at all these days.

 

[waitin2go]

people who are successful at sex cannot imagine my situation to such an extent that they literally make narcissistic strawmen about me instead of listening.

You're right; I guess none of us are therapists trained to help in your niche. Perhaps "venting" would have been a better tag than "help"; but also truly sorry you couldn't find the help you are looking for.

Then again that's why the rest of us are here too (myself included); not really looking for the myriad of solutions and paths available to us as they are to others; or an actual solution to our problems; or the ability to "suck it up and move on" or "pull up yer bootstraps and just try again" or "if there's a will there's a way" (that's me in other areas of life like work etc). I too am struggling in that sense.

Hope you find whatever you're searching for, and if not, hope you find the most peaceful exit

 

[Adûnâi]

or an actual solution to our problems; only hell bent on having our outcomes a certain specific way

Thanks, but coping with no sex is the name of the game for me (if only you saw what I'm writing on DeepSeek, AI is a saviour here). And I watch Warcraft 3 tournaments and streamers, and should play some, too. But coping isn't getting at the heat of the problem, that would be backwards.

 

[Adûnâi]

Would you have any suggestions on how to get a gf?
The only thing I can think of is go to uni where thousands go and ask each of them?
In 2 years when I'm 30 and maybe my house arrest is lifted.
(Talking about this makes me suicidal btw.)
My mom again mentions I'm gonna have 20k EUR when my granny sells her apartment before dying in 2027, I wonder if that would be sufficient for a gf. To be fair, I wasn't bitching this hard before, so maybe my mom does her magic this time? Talking to chads who have had 5+ gfs makes me suicidal, but I need any info I can claw out.

 

[Adûnâi]

I obviously cannot share my DeepSeek escapades here, unless in this roundabout fashion. AI is a life saver. Enjoying a Jumanji-style dice-rolling game... Imagine if it becomes reality ca. 2035 lmao.

 

[EmptyBottle]

I obviously cannot share my DeepSeek escapades here, unless in this roundabout fashion. AI is a life saver. Enjoying a Jumanji-style dice-rolling game... Imagine if it becomes reality ca. 2035 lmao.

I use free AI like https://venice.ai/ , chatGPT, https://huggingface.co/chat and similar (yes, I think they all have paid tier but if I hit limits I switch around)
I sometimes use it to discuss ideas that seem to bore others, but the AI is happy to discuss.

 

[Adûnâi]

I use free AI like https://venice.ai/ , chatGPT, https://huggingface.co/chat and similar (yes, I think they all have paid tier but if I hit limits I switch around)

Just tried Venice - MODS PLS DELETE if it's too lewd - but if it's ok, I've tried it on chastity, which might not even normal censors anyway - but seems amusing enough.

Of course, paying them 18 USD per month when DeepSeek is barely 2 USD and use as you please is an overkill. Thanks for the suggestion though!

An incel pal has recently reached out to me on Reddit, talking about his thread about robowaifus where I wrote back but he was already banned - he suggested VR as a stepping stone. Which could be considered, honestly, it would be quite an experience to be share a 3d space with my waifu, even without tactile sensations. Although the issue with such tech is that it might get both cheaper and more advanced with each passing year. And, most importantly, AI just isn't there yet anyway.

1) AI to talk to her;
2) VR to witness her;
3) robowaifu to get fucked by.

To me, talking is obviously the most important thing - especially considering that robowaifus literally don't exist yet (in forms that would mimic the human body anyway), and VR is just a gimmick that I'm not entirely sold on.