If any of you have money, please eat nice food on my behalf :)

[pleaseletmeperish]

I do eat nice homemade food everyday but I have always wanted to try new cuisines. Even common food like cake and fancier cheese are too expensive for me, plus I feel like I don't deserve them. So please, if you have money, enjoy some on my behalf. Just a (probably silly but completely sincere) request :)

 

[bankai]

I understand. I enjoy food too. Had pastries every day during New Year and Christmas. I've cut that out now cause I put on some weight lol.I do try out a lot of stuff often. I had ramen a couple of days ago, shawarma yesterday. Butter chicken and Naan today.Chinese sometimes. There are a lot of decent restaurants on Uber Eats and stuff that you can just sort through and find that are reasonably priced . Fancy gourmet stuff like cheese can always be expensive because it's been fermented and stored for a long time. I avoid that stuff, but I understand the desire to Window shop and try stuff like that.

I do just one meal a day. Otherwise known famously as OMAD. So it isn't too expensive or difficult to manage.

 

[iw2live_idkhow]

I've been recklessly spending money on food lately because anything for a small hit of pleasure right?

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Well we just ordered a pizza so there you have it.

 

[NearlyIrrelevantCake]

I've been recklessly spending money on food lately because anything for a small hit of pleasure right?

Hard relate.

 

[Crow_88]

Pita and smoothing on the way. I'll do my best to enjoy it for myself and for you! Anything for a moment of peace.

 

[ma0]

I'll be sure to get myself sushi tomorrow, in your honor.

 

[BRAINWORMS]

It's hot out where I live, so I'm getting an acai bowl and a smoothie in your honor!

 

[Cauliflour]

If you want to save money but eat nice food then here's a recipe for what I call "a microwave cake" (baking ingredients tend to be quite cheap and you can make a lot with them so it works out to be cost effective):
Ingredients:
- self raising flour
- caster sugar (doesn't matter much what kind I think but it'll affect the texture)
- egg
- milk
- cocoa powder (optional)
- vanilia extract (best with it but optional if you can't afford it)
- margarine or butter
- baking powder...? (there's some in the flour but cake recipies always state to add more so here it is ig)

Equipment:
- a ceramic bowl that's not mixing bowl sized but like big enough to fit half a box worth of cereal in
- another little bowl that won't burn in the microwave for the butter/margarine
- some dessert spoons, or just big spoons from the dining table if your culture doesn't have dessert spoons
- a microwave
- baking paper (makes it much easier to remove and saves you from having to clean the bowl)
- sieve for the flour (if you care about everything being not lumpy)
- a fork, a long, thin pointy stick or a cake tester if you have one

Everything is in proportion to the egg. 1 egg makes 2 servings. These measurements are rough guesses as I tend to mostly eyeball it.
1. Put some baking paper in the bowl. Make sure it's covering all the inside surface and has some sticking out so you know it won't go over.
2. Put in 4 spoons worth of flour in (use the sieve if you want a better consistency) or 3 spoons and 1 spoon of cocoa powder for chocolate cake.
3. Put either 3 or 4 spoons of sugar in I'm not sure exactly how much (if you're using baking powder then put some in here now)
4. chuck about 3 spoon blobs of butter/margarine into the little bowl and put it in the microwave for about a minute or until melted. DON'T TOUCH IT it burns.
5. Put the butter/margarine in as well as the egg and the vanilia extract.
6. You should have a bowl that looks like a pile of various ingredients. Try your best to mix it up (hold onto the baking paper that's outside the bowl's container to stop it from spinning). If it's too wet add more flour. If it's too dry add a little bit of milk (I always find it a bit dry so that's why I added it in the ingredients list). The consistency is hard to explain as I'm not a professional baker but you can look up videos online on what cake batter looks like mixed if you want to double check.
7. Place the bowl in the microwave and leave it in for about 2 1/2-5 minutes depending on how powerful your microwave is. The important thing is to use your stabbing stick to see if the cake mixture is fully cooked in the middle. If when you stab straight down and move it back up there's still mixture on, it needs more cooking. If all that comes out is bits of stuck cake crumbs then you did it!
8. Lift the baking paper out of the bowl and onto a plate or any kind of flat surface, and remove it from the sides. Microwave cake!
9. If you want to make some quick icing then get out icing sugar and a bit of water and chuck some icing sugar into a cup and put a little bit of water in and mix it with a fork (make sure it's very thick otherwise you've put too much water in).

I like to make this when I crave sugar but I don't want to go out and spend money on overpriced chocolate. Takes about 10 minutes I think. I don't know if the ingredients listed are universal but I can confirm they are in Britain so there's that. The eggs might be a problem though, if you're American...

 

[Sabrinaxox]

This is so kind hearted! I also love food and honestly trying new types of food is like my favorite activity haha. I am manifesting lots and lots of nice food for you and everyone in this thread :) Also if this helps at all, you can always sign up for loyalty points if there are restaurants you go to frequently which offer it. I have done this a lot and eventually you get to treat yourself to some free food!

 

[cait_sith]

If you want to save money but eat nice food then here's a recipe for what I call "a microwave cake" (baking ingredients tend to be quite cheap and you can make a lot with them so it works out to be cost effective):
Ingredients:
- self raising flour
- caster sugar (doesn't matter much what kind I think but it'll affect the texture)
- egg
- milk
- cocoa powder (optional)
- vanilia extract (best with it but optional if you can't afford it)
- margarine or butter
- baking powder...? (there's some in the flour but cake recipies always state to add more so here it is ig)

Equipment:
- a ceramic bowl that's not mixing bowl sized but like big enough to fit half a box worth of cereal in
- another little bowl that won't burn in the microwave for the butter/margarine
- some dessert spoons, or just big spoons from the dining table if your culture doesn't have dessert spoons
- a microwave
- baking paper (makes it much easier to remove and saves you from having to clean the bowl)
- sieve for the flour (if you care about everything being not lumpy)
- a fork, a long, thin pointy stick or a cake tester if you have one

Everything is in proportion to the egg. 1 egg makes 2 servings. These measurements are rough guesses as I tend to mostly eyeball it.View attachment 168194
1. Put some baking paper in the bowl. Make sure it's covering all the inside surface and has some sticking out so you know it won't go over.
2. Put in 4 spoons worth of flour in (use the sieve if you want a better consistency) or 3 spoons and 1 spoon of cocoa powder for chocolate cake.
3. Put either 3 or 4 spoons of sugar in I'm not sure exactly how much (if you're using baking powder then put some in here now)
4. chuck about 3 spoon blobs of butter/margarine into the little bowl and put it in the microwave for about a minute or until melted. DON'T TOUCH IT it burns.
5. Put the butter/margarine in as well as the egg and the vanilia extract.
6. You should have a bowl that looks like a pile of various ingredients. Try your best to mix it up (hold onto the baking paper that's outside the bowl's container to stop it from spinning). If it's too wet add more flour. If it's too dry add a little bit of milk (I always find it a bit dry so that's why I added it in the ingredients list). The consistency is hard to explain as I'm not a professional baker but you can look up videos online on what cake batter looks like mixed if you want to double check.
7. Place the bowl in the microwave and leave it in for about 2 1/2-5 minutes depending on how powerful your microwave is. The important thing is to use your stabbing stick to see if the cake mixture is fully cooked in the middle. If when you stab straight down and move it back up there's still mixture on, it needs more cooking. If all that comes out is bits of stuck cake crumbs then you did it!
8. Lift the baking paper out of the bowl and onto a plate or any kind of flat surface, and remove it from the sides. Microwave cake!
9. If you want to make some quick icing then get out icing sugar and a bit of water and chuck some icing sugar into a cup and put a little bit of water in and mix it with a fork (make sure it's very thick otherwise you've put too much water in).

I like to make this when I crave sugar but I don't want to go out and spend money on overpriced chocolate. Takes about 10 minutes I think. I don't know if the ingredients listed are universal but I can confirm they are in Britain so there's that. The eggs might be a problem though, if you're American...

Finally a recipe on this site that doesn't involve antiemetics

 

[Alexandra0]

There is very little money, everything goes to medicine and doctors. And even if there was, I still can't eat or drink almost anything tasty. Not life, but continuous disappointment.
Your request is not stupid at all, I am sending you a mental chocolate cake with fondant and cherries on top

 

[infinitiez]

Would love to make you guys some banana bread, it contains cinnamon too which is my favorite part.
Here is my favorite banana bread recipe.

 

[Cauliflour]

Finally a recipe on this site that doesn't involve antiemetics

Don't worry, you can still add them in if you so please. That's the benefit of baking at home: you can add whatever horrible drugs you desire in whatever quantities and truly make it your own. I wouldn't advise you do that though as cake is supposed to sit in your stomach, not as vomit on the floor...

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

Recipe for [REDACTED]

Ingredients:

• 1 pile of sand (unused)
• 35 grams of metal music
• 52 units of danger
• 3 cat poops (fresh)
• 11 milliseconds
• a spoonful of dreams (expired)

Instructions:

1. Wait until Sunday. Other days will result in major emotional damage.
2. Wait until Night. If the sun is out while you're preparing, the sun god HELIOS will give you skin cancer.
3. Get the danger and put it in your mouth, chewing for 37 seconds.
4. Spit the chewed danger into a bow. Add the poops, the sand and the dreams.
5. Microwave for about 4 Hours. Don't stop midway or the mix will gain sentience and enter your nearest hole.
6. Get the mix, and punch it until it screams.
7. Add the milliseconds, and dance around the bowl until you piss yourself. This is important, or the final result will be lackluster.
8. Put the metal music inside a bowl of freezing water, mix until homogeneous.
9. Put both mixtures together in a large pan, cook for 45 minutes.
10. Worth 5 servings. To enhance flavor, put foot inside bowl before serving. If not eaten after 6 days, will cause the wererats to rise again.

 

[Bad Ending]

If you don't have PSSD, please jerk off on my behalf

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

If you don't have PSSD, please jerk off on my behalf

I'll do it every day even! Just for you, of course.

 

[Bad Ending]

I'll do it every day even! Just for you, of course.

"I dedicate this fap to the memory of my comrade Bad Ending..."

 

[bankai]

"I dedicate this fap in the memory of my comrade Bad Ending..."

Isn't it a happy ending though,just saying

 

[Unbearable Mr. Bear]

"I dedicate this fap in the memory of my comrade Bad Ending..."

Therefore, I, Unbearable Mr. "Mama" Bear, have taken over the responsibility to output enough genital fluids daily to appease and to honor the great Bad Ending, whose commitment to giving everyone else a good one is applauded and remembered. May the cum gods smile on our favor, in this orgasmic day. Amen...

*starts furiously masturbating to hardcore furry porn*

 

[notreallybored]

ב''ה,
Thread must be fake because everyone who called it "fapping" is dead by now.

It all goes to bills. Used to eat stupidly "well," though wasn't kosher enough then, and now.. this is America. Some horrible version of it, anyway.

You can make an assortment of tolerable-to-excellent microwave cakes starting from pancake mix, in vented Tupperware or one of those soup mugs with the vented lid, but they will cook faster on the sides so anything fully round may be a bit easier keeping it under 2" in height.

Can't afford pancake mix anymore. Those microwave coffee cakes that used to go into the tray of crisping sleeve material were the bomb, and that solves the cooking the middle but, can't really mix that stuff with other cookware so without the properly origami'd to pour batter in one you're screwed. Microwave bundt pans also existed for a while, and you could bother with that or an inverted cup in your Tupperware, but I usually do like 4 minutes full plus 13 on 40% power and get a decently steamed through result that you could choose to dry out any by taking the lid off. Might be overkill numbers, that was a 700 watt oven as does make dialing in perfect timings more forgiving between raw and smoldering.

 

[struggles_inc]

Finally a recipe on this site that doesn't involve antiemetics

I laughed so hard it cured my mood a bit. Thanks.

 

[doneforlife]

One of the reasons I want to end my life. Food restriction.