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Busridin'26

Busridin'26

Hating every minute of being alive.
Dec 8, 2019
1,944
I always find myself at a place where I'm ready to die but i DREAD the planning. I don't wanna go impulsively. I do not wanna sit through the planning.

Having realized all that im... fucking indecisive of everything....

Truthfully just wanna find a low effort method that isnt violent and too painful. Leave all my shit here. CTB.

LIKE im not into the planning and shit AT ALL. It always hinders me and has nothing to fucking do with my resolve to die.

Has everything to do with my distate for life.

Gonna be cutting some corners that aren't necessary corners at all. Like i dont fucking care about my stuff bc.. I'll be dead!!!

Im annoyed that ive been placing importance on stupid shit thats just hindering me. When i decided to let go of life that included material shit. It included everything...

Been MAKING myself desperate by worrying about things and holding off.

With all that being said...

I wanna die like yesterday. Time limits like a month or so but truthfully
I wanna be gone in like a week or 2.

Life is giving me nothing and I dont want anything from it.. I'm actually slightly satisfied with how I myself navigated this world.

Im soo ready to go. Cut out the stupid bullshit planning of my stuff and any other life thing and im not feeling like its impossible.


I feel like i mentally have the space to find a plan and executed something.

All I wanted to do before I die was chill / eat/ not care.

Done that and like im good now.. I don't feel desperate or outta options. I'm just fuckin tired of holding off for basically no reason of my own...

Research that can be done on a stupid sleepless night and here I am.. waiting on nothing.
 
  • Love
  • Like
Reactions: Barracuda91, Wrennie and patheticpartner
H

hendry

Member
Jan 4, 2021
32
I wish you the best. I hope you find what makes you happy. I want your peace!
 
  • Hugs
Reactions: Busridin'26 and patheticpartner
Busridin'26

Busridin'26

Hating every minute of being alive.
Dec 8, 2019
1,944
I always find myself at a place where I'm ready to die but i DREAD the planning. I don't wanna go impulsively. I do not wanna sit through the planning.

Having realized all that im... fucking indecisive of everything....

Truthfully just wanna find a low effort method that isnt violent and too painful. Leave all my shit here. CTB.

LIKE im not into the planning and shit AT ALL. It always hinders me and has nothing to fucking do with my resolve to die.

Has everything to do with my distate for life.

Gonna be cutting some corners that aren't necessary corners at all. Like i dont fucking care about my stuff bc.. I'll be dead!!!

Im annoyed that ive been placing importance on stupid shit thats just hindering me. When i decided to let go of life that included material shit. It included everything...

Been MAKING myself desperate by worrying about things and holding off.

With all that being said...

I wanna die like yesterday. Time limits like a month or so but truthfully
I wanna be gone in like a week or 2.

Life is giving me nothing and I dont want anything from it.. I'm actually slightly satisfied with how I myself navigated this world.

Im soo ready to go. Cut out the stupid bullshit planning of my stuff and any other life thing and im not feeling like its impossible.


I feel like i mentally have the space to find a plan and executed something.

All I wanted to do before I die was chill / eat/ not care.

Done that and like im good now.. I don't feel desperate or outta options. I'm just fuckin tired of holding off for basically no reason of my own...

Research that can be done on a stupid sleepless night and here I am.. waiting on nothing.

Kinda smiling again. Coming full circle with thoughts and knowing my choice...
I actually feel relaxed to an extent. Nothing currently matters. Anything that comes up as an obstacle doesn't matter.

I do not need life to die. I
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wrennie

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