I wish I was social

[Parnate]

I see people who are social, who have dozens of friends. They go on trips with their friends. I am so jealous of them. I wish I too could have done that. Wish I had my own friends group. But I feel uncomfortable with most people.
There are very friends whose company I genuinely enjoy, but they are married and have got busy.
many people socialise after office, I wish I could but I don't have the energy left to do that.
I guess it is in my fate

 

[U. A.]

How about hobby groups? Some find it easier when there's a "thing" to do. Could be on days off when you have more energy, or online even.

 

[Lady_V]

God this sounds like a mirror with my experience. Being social is something you can work on but how when you have 0 energy??? It ufortunely gets worse the older you get too :(

 

[katara]

I am the same way, even with ppl on here I try reaching out and asking for advice and I get ignored bc people only want to talk to normal ppl I guess

 

[antithesis]

Autistic & social anxiety here, I feel you and sending you a big virtual hug
Making friends as an adult is such a mystery to me. Following this post for future tips ahah

 

[Pluto]

 

[Busridin'26]

I relate. I want to be social but lack the energy majority of the time. Don't per say have much solutions or advice atm : (

Hope ur able to find smthin that helps

 

[noreason.toexist]

I relate to this as well. I have social anxiety and can pretty much not talk to people IRL apart from work stuff.

I am lucky to have had a handful of friends from high school that were also extremely bad with social interactions, and one of the more extroverted people of them strung us all together.

What definitely helps me is if it's over text. I am a million times better over text than when I say things out loud. (Plus, I enjoy text more than things like voice mail too).

I was at a point where I had no one, and I just hung out in VRChat every day just ""stalking"" people. People accepted me as being a mute, and I've been picked up by a small group. I highly recommend online games or groups (like SaSu) to meet people that enjoy the same things as you do, especially cause the low amounts of energy you do have are more easily spent and last longer in those fields.

I can only speak for myself of course, but if there's certain topics where you feel like you can talk a lot about, look for people also in that niche and you'll be a ton more likely to make friends there.

(What's hard for me is actually KEEPING those friends.. but that's another topic I suppose)

 

[magnolia_3]

Same. I also have anxiety. Even if I try to socialise with someone, the immediate reaction or facial expression they make, makes me just want to vanish. It's hard for me to even ask for help at stores. Then later that day I would overthink any kind of interaction I had and what they could possibly think abt me now.