Venting I want to give up

[AnnonyBox]

I want to just give up. People are just rude and egotistical everywhere, I hate myself for the stupidest reasons, and I can't do anything I wanted with my life. I need to create, to make my art, or I feel stifled and worthless, but work takes up all my time. I want to die, but if I make a mistake and survive I could lose my job and then lose everything. I want to go back to the time when I just didn't have the energy to do anything, and I gave in to my depression. I gave up on everything, cancelled all my art passion projects, and slept for most of the day everyday. I was finally free to die, and now I'm forced to live out of the fear of my suffering becoming worse. In a compassionate world I could end my misery without being punished by this selfish parasitic world.

 

[Bullit]

What is more important, doing art or retreating from the world??

 

[AnnonyBox]

What is more important, doing art or retreating from the world??

As if I have a choice. I feel worthless if I can't exercise my creativity, but life circumstances won't let me. If I'm not allowed to live for my passions, then I would rather retreat from the world into living emptily.

I don't get to enjoy anything, nothing feels good anymore, and I'm always too exhausted or stressed to try. Forget trying to form meaningful connections with people either, it always ends in pain.

 

[FuneralCry]

This world certainly is cruel and selfish. Living really can be exhausting and I know what it is like to want to give up. I see a right to die as really important, the fear of failing also holds me back.