Venting I think my mom wishes it was me instead of my brother (who died)

[Astrid_nh]

The relationship between me and my mom has been pretty bad for a couple years now, we argue a lot and a lot of things get said.

She has never said the words, but I can't help but feel like she thinks that way, if it had been me, the problems that I've caused her would't have happened.

 

[WanderingGypsy]

I am so sorry you have to be going thru this and feel this way! Grief is a really hard thing and can turn someone into a completely different person. I hope that it's your mom's grief making her act this way towards you, but that doesn't make it ok. Just because we are grieving or going thru a hard time doesn't mean we can be mean or uncaring.
I hope you find some support and comfort from others!

 

[bankai]

Seems like you're just feeling guilty. You don't have anything to do with your brother's death, so why would she wish it was you? If his death was a separate issue, then it is what it is. In fact, now you would be even more important to her, I suppose. This is what is more likely. As a mother, she is suffering. Her relationship with you will be more strained in general because she's struggling more as a person. I don't think you need to feel bad. And you certainly don't need to think this way.

 

[OhhDrugzZ]

Hey, I'm so sorry for you! I had to go through a similar situation where my mom said a lot of mean things to me and also told me that I was a mistake. Again, I feel so sorry for you. You're not the only one going through this<3

 

[cemeteryismyhome]

Obviously I don't know anything about your situation other than what you said here, but as a parent myself I would have to guess she probably doesn't really feel that way about you. But I can kind-of sympathize with you, in a way. I didn't lose a brother but I've always known my dad hated my existence because I ruined his plans for his life, by simply being born alive. Sorry you've had it so tough.