I think im too far gone...

[Some place nice]

I was cleaning the knife in used to try to ctb with. It was still do sharp... I just wanted to slit my arms open... But the love of my life drive all the way down here and I ain't about to traumatize them even more. I just want the sweet release of death. Sometimes they like to be touched and other times they dont. I have to learn when they like touch and not and when they switch personalities. I'm not complaining I love them so so much but, my love language is physical touch and baking. I wanted to hold their hand and kiss it but they told me that they dont like to be touched. I think I scared them too... It was the first time I cuddled someone and I went a little psycho obsessive and kept pulling them close not wanting them to escape... I dont want to be alone again... But I think they're gonna leave me like everyone else.

 

[edu0z]

I'm so sorry you're going through something like this.

 

[PairOfAirJordan1’s]

A bit cliché, but you should try to communicate with them about it. It might be awkward, but I'd bet breaking through the awkward shell and being open about it would be better than being filled with anxiety because you think they might leave you. But idk, I don't really have any relationship experience so this could just be a bunch of mumbo jumbo. I hope you feel better