I know you'll get it from others, but no judgment here. I'll just say I think it's risky. It's not out of the realm of possibility to be only deflected off the train (if you're planning to use the "jump in front of" method), and only end up seriously hurt, but not killed. It can happen. The other train way is decapitation by laying your neck on the tracks, but that takes an enormous amount of discipline and fortitude. I hope you really think things through with this method regarding the risk of being unsuccessful and, if you go through with it, I hope you plan it out as best you can so you'll have the greatest chance of success for yourself.