Venting i regret standing up when i tried partial last night

[SHThrowAway213]

i got close to passing out yesterday but si kicked in and i stood up before i did
i have been filled with regret and kicking myself all day today
its the first time ive got that close...and i stood up
i tried again today and its the same issues as always, that i cant pass out
but i nearly did yesterday, what gives?
i didnt do anything different
so frustrating

 

[any%]

Although I did not want to hear it when I got told the same thing, but maybe there is something left in you & not only purely SI, that wants to keep going for now. Anyway, I know how you feel, it is a shitty and cruel feeling. Do not beat yourself up about it though, makes things even worse. Maybe get some proper sleep if sleep is an option for you!

 

[Deathbydemo]

I am so sorry you are frustrated but honestly, I think this is the universes way of trying to tell you to wait. Not to completely give up on your plan but just to hold on for a little while longer. I don't think it's your time to go.

 

[TAW122]

I think it's partially the SI and also self-preservation kicking in and your body fearing itself ceasing to exist, thus subconsciously your body involuntary stood up so you don't pass out. I'm sorry that things aren't working out for you and I hope you are able to find peace in the future.