I've picked out two ways I would like to ctb. SN and NN. The problem with NN is that I can' find my carotid and induce passing out with my hands. So there's no way I can pass out with my Offwhite belt and rolled up t-shirts. I an get SN but I can't get the other drugs required for a 100% success rate. All I have is hydrocodone and a bunch of alcohol, and that's not even enough to effectively kill me. I'm so useless I can't even kill myself. I iwsh I could just manually stop breathing. Fuck my life.
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